Life... As It Was

I got out of the house, for the first *real* time this week. I went to Bristol, to visit my old friends at Belk. Typically, when I go to Bristol, I'm always in a hurry. I just want to get my makeup, get my nails done, and get home. I enjoy visiting with my friends, but for some reason, I'm always in a hurry. Not today. Today, I took my time. I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I wanted to enjoy the things I had once taken for granted.

I went into Belk, and saw Holly. She informed me that "Little Bit's" step-father had passed away yesterday. I was really sorry to hear that. I believe he was only in his 50's. Holly said she had seen him on friday, and he seemed to be just fine. It just proves how short our lives are, and that our time could be up any given day.

After visiting and catching up for a minute, I went down to the nail salon. As usual, they were really busy, and asked me to come back in 30 minutes. I have very little money, so actual shopping was out of the question. What to do? I knew I wanted to go to Villa Pizza for a garlic roll. I used to LOVE those things. When I worked at Proffits', we'd get 5 or 6 of them, and sneak into the Clinique bay to eat them. Of course, we weren't supposed to be eating on the sales floor, but do you think that stopped us? Of course not!

So, I walked into Villa Pizza to get my long awaited garlic rolls. They're just basically a calzone without anything inside, sprinkled with garlic salt and Parmesan cheese. Don't ask me why, but I LOVE those things. I could eat a dozen of them myself. I had planned on enjoying at least two, but they only had one very small one. So, the small one had to do.

As I sat in the food court eating my one tiny garlic roll, nostalgia reared it's ugly head. Maybe it was the time of day, the familiar taste of comfort food, or seeing dusk through the skylight, but my heart was really heavy. I wanted nothing more than to be getting up from that table, and walking into Proffitts' to work once again. As crazy as it sounds, I felt like I was back in time, to 2004. I felt the same way I did when I was only working in accessories with Mary. It took me a few minutes to snap back to reality. The reality that I no longer work at Proffitts'-- that Proffitts' no longer exists. The reality that my counter is gone, and the store looks nothing like it once did. The reality that Verna is dead, and my friends and I have drifted apart.

Everything changes. We go through things we thing are so terrible, have jobs we think we hate, and then realize years later, we had it so good. Walking through that little mall in Bristol, I realized how good I had it, and how I'd give just about anything to have it back. I can't have it back. I can't go back, but I can re-live it anytime. All I have to do is close my eyes. I can still see Verna at her register, and my Elizabeth Arden bay-- That poor bay was literally about 30 years old. I thought it was so ghetto and ratty, but you know, I made it look pretty good. I can still see it the way it was. I can still see everything the way it was.

Spending some time by myself today was really good for me. Although, I was sad when I left the mall, I was happy to be able to have those memories. I was happy that I had the opportunities that I've had. I'm happy to say I was touched by not only friends, but a job that meant something to me.