You know, I've been noticing a growing trend in people feeling so insecure about themselves. I think we've all been there. Take high school as a prime example. I don't know if you would call it insecurity, vanity, or a combination of the two, but I would NOT leave the house unless I was perfect. My hair had to be spiral curled, I had to have my makeup on, some type of designer clothing and handbag. It was essential to my well-being to be seen in and as such. Ok, I guess it would border more on vanity, because I KNEW I looked good.
Moving on, I remember so many people feeling so bad about themselves- thinking they were too fat, thin, their nose was too big, or they didn't have enough money. High school is such a difficult time in itself. People struggle to fit in, and/or find out who they are, only to graduate, and figure out it didn't matter to begin with. In high school, I didn't exactly care if I fit in or not. I was what you would call, independently popular. I wasn't a part of any clique, but you can be guaranteed everyone in EHS knew my name in 1996. I loved people, and loved to have fun. Yeah, I wanted to be perfect, but deep down inside, I knew it was ok that I wasn't.
There were so many people who didn't know it wasn't ok to be perfect. Take for example the captain of the cheerleading team. Bless her heart, she was pitiful. She was anorexic and looked like nothing but skin and bones. Her self-esteem must've been shit. It has to be so painful to feel that, that's your only option. Starving yourself to achieve the perfect body, when in the end, there was nothing wrong with your body to being with.
Who set the standards of what's beautiful? I mean, what I think is beautiful, another person might think is just pathetic, and vice versa. When did we stop loving ourselves for who we are, and put so much emphasis on how much we weigh, how much money we have, what type of degree we have, and how much surgery we can have to "improve" our bodies? I just don't know.
What I do know: I'm a fuller-figure woman, I've lost over 100lbs, and I'm still "fuller-figure", and you know what, I don't give a damn. I love myself. I loved myself when I was over 300lbs, and I love myself now that I'm down near where I was in high school. I love myself when I walk out of the house looking like something Morris scratched in his liter box, and when I walk out of the house looking like I've stepped off of the runway.
It takes a long time to learn that it's really ok to just be you. It takes a big person to look in the mirror, and love what they see, no matter what. It took me a long time to really be comfortable with that idea, but once I did, I didn't worry anymore. So what if I've got some extra skin, or I'm getting a few crows feet around my eyes, hell, I've earned all of that, and some more! I'm a beautiful woman now, and always will be, because I have more than enough love in my heart, and love from those around me.
Do me a favor, give yourself a pat on the back, because if you're still reading this, you're a damn beautiful person!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
.JPG)
.JPG)
.JPG)
.JPG)
.JPG)
17 comments:
Amen, Sister!
So glad to read the strike is over too - that is really great news.
I am signing off with a huge smile on my face, thanks for that! :o)
You are a beautiful person, inside and outside..
I really needed this, this evening.. See.. You never know whose heart you are gonna touch. You just touched mine..**hugs**
You are fantastic.
No witty remarks here, just a big, genuine thank you and a smile. ((Christy))
I know you can't see it but I am actually standing here and clapping. I say applause!
I wish more people would realize that it isn't what's on the outside that matters. It is all in what's inside.
Looks can and always will fade...it's the one guarantee in life other than the fact we will all die someday.
Thanks for posting this, as it is very enlightening, and hopefully will change the thinking of many out there :)
Christy,
You've always had it all together. Now...tell us again what color your hair is? Red, Blond, Black? Curly hair tho? Hmmmm? Congrates on losing so much weight....I know you have to be feeling so much better.
I know you're sleeping better now the the strike is over. That thing went way too long.
My daughter is just recovering from anarexia. Some of those girls in the hospital were just pitiful. 3 were in wheelchairs. Just sooo much advertising on TV, radio and print showing the perfect body.
Pulling an all night shift.... and its too cold here "As big as you think it is!." But will get Friday off...and Sat and Sun.
Have a super party this week-end. Just be careful where you stick your hands... they like hiding the cuffs!
*Hugs*
BRAVO, Christy - an excellent post. We live in a culture that tells us no matter how hard we try we cannot be beautiful enough, wealthy enough or accessorized enough. It is really hard to buck that trend and remember that who we are matters more than what we look like. When I look through a magazine or watch tv, I am always reminded of the intro to a tv show when I was a kid, the Six Million Dollar Man - the line was "we can rebuild him, make him better, stronger, faster than before" Why?
Why aren't we good enough the way we come? Does God have separate entrances at the Pearly Gates for just the beautiful people? I think not!
wow, i'm still sort of speechless after that.......your a much strong women than i am and for that i give you major props. i've never, ever been comfortable with myself and suffer from low, low self esteem and after reading your post i realize that i am way to harsh on myself, we need more people like you out there to make us aware, and be proud of the way god made us
excellent post!!
You are AWSOME !!! I'm pretty sure that the fashion/advertising industry has a major role in defining beauty. Unfortunately, it's not a realistic definition. It's everywhere and completely unavoidable. I watch it affecting my 11 year old daughter and it breaks my heart. SIGH!
Your truly a beautiful person...
right on!!
I was just like you when I was in high school and college. I had to be dressed a special way AND I had to have my hair fixed and makeup on..
Now that Ive gotten older, Im nothing like I used to be. Ive also gotten used to being a 'curvy woman' and threw out all my smash and mash minimizer bras!
Your right of course. we shouldn't lose weight in order to look better to others. we should be concerned about what we weigh only for health reasons and it is up to the individual even then.
Christy: you've always been beautiful to me, but self-esteem may not have anything to do with looks, although I know I have not been blessed... I must've been away the day G-d handed out beauty.
I never leave the house without makeup.... it would scare little children.
However, self-esteem doesn't have to be about looks. It's also to do with lack of confidence, having no belief in yourself because others make you feel that way.
If people/children are encouraged to feel good about themselves, then they grow up well adjusted and confident, but if everything you do is always wrong, you can be the most beautiful person on the planet, you will still have no self-esteem.
have a lovely weekend
lotsa luv ann xxxx
A great post! I remember those days when I felt terrible about myself, and I am soooo glad those days are over! Now, I realize that it is okay to be me. No one will ever look perfect, or be perfect. I believe that the only perfection is imperfection. I am so glad that those low self-esteem days are over and that I have learned that confidence comes from the inside, not how one looks on the outside.
A great post! Thank you for sharing!
That was uplifting! Thanks for that!
Oh I'm still reading and I couldn't agree more!
I suffered from poor self esteem all throughout my childhood because both of my parent's did unfortunately, and I didn't know any better because I thought that's how ALL people thought of themselves.
I sure know better now and I've learned over the years to really really love and accept the me that I am.
Great post and you ARE a beautiful person! :)
very good post. i've also noticed the same thing.
muchos kudos.
Amen again!!! I am SO with you on all of this. What counts is what's on the INSIDE--and there are so many different kinds of "outside" beauty!
I have 3 girls, so I really want them to understand that beauty is more than being skinny, having great hair, perfect skin, whatever . .. they don't have to live up to anyone ELSE'S standards, just love themselves!
Great post!!
(I'm just catching up on several days worth here.)
Hell yeah! My step mom said something so perfect to my daughter about the wrinkles in her face. My daughter asked her why she had all those cracks in her face and I thought my dad was going to die! My step mom just looked at her and said the she loved her sooo much, her body couldn't contain it all and it made the cracks in her face. Fabulous answer. So now, my daughter actively kisses any wrinkle because that just means you have tons of love!!
Post a Comment