True Friendship?

For the past couple of days, a former friend of mine, Heather, has been on my mind. Heather was my best friend from 1st grade. We had the best time together. I could be silly and crazy around Heather, and she would be equally as nuts. From the 4th grade on, we had planned our weddings. We didn't know who we were going to marry, but we knew what we wanted when we did meet that special someone. We ordered those free bridal invitation magazines that the bridal magazines were flooded with. We got book after book, sample after sample, and just KNEW what it was we wanted. We we got married, I was going to be her maid of honor, and she was going to be mine.

Through the years we fought off and on, but always ended up being friends in the end. In August of 2002, she was married. She told me she was having a very small wedding with no attendants. Although hurt, I respected her decision. She said she wasn't sending out any invitations, just to come. Ok. This was NOTHING like she had planned, but I know things change, and people change. I went to Heather's wedding. Her mother was the matron of honor. That hurt, but once again, I respected her decision. I was grateful just to be there.

On December of 2002, I was married. I started planning VERY early. I notified Heather I wanted her to be my maid of honor (since Monger was going to be the matron of honor). I wanted my two best friends standing beside of me. I told Heather how much it would cost to have her dress made. For weeks she put me off, until she finally said she didn't have the money to have the dress made-- and then, had the audicity to infer that I was trying to make money off of the deal. I was OUTRAGED. I told her she could come look at the reciepts and see exactly how much the material costs to make each dress. Desperate, I even offered to pay for her dress.

She wasn't in my wedding. My heart was absolutely broken. One of my best friends, who had been there since age 6, wasn't there for me. I didn't send her an invitation, and she didn't show up. I didn't want here there anymore. It hurt. Badly. But, it showed me just who she was. Heather wasn't my friend. She never was. Heather is a lost soul. She's a victim of her mother's ideal. He mother sacrificed her marriage to make Heather the center of her world. Dressing her the way she wanted her to, and passively agressively manipulating her to be the person she wanted to be. Heather grew up to be a shallow woman, to whom friendship means nothing. It means so little, that the man she's married to, was the boyfriend of another of her best friends, Brandy.

I think about Heather from time to time. It still hurts to know that she's the kind of person she is, but she made her choices, and I made mine. She told my aunt the last time she saw her, that she hated that we "fell out of touch." We didn't fall out of touch. I've made a concious choice not to call her. I have nothing to say.

I'm just thankful for the TRUE, REAL friends I do have. I'm thankful for Monger, Justin, Jake, Michael, Missy, and all of those whom I can truly count on. I'm thankful for those who have held my hand, and not in vain. Those who will stand up for me, and support me, even when I'm wrong. I love you guys, and I thank you for never letting me down. I thank you for not being a "Heather".