Anger, Worry and Everything In Between...

Sorry it's been a few days since I've written. I've had a lot going on! First off, I'd like to send a big congrats to Perverted Justice! 50 busts in California Way to go! For those of you who didn't see Dateline NBC last friday night, Perverted Justice is a group of volunteers who patrol the internet in search of pedophiles and predators of children. They were solicited by 51 adult men seeking sex for with underage boys and girls. Perverted Justice is a wonderful group, and I hope to become a member one day. Right now, I volunteer as a "human shield". Our job is to go into a chat room with an underage profile, waiting for perverts to send a private message to us. Once they begin taking the conversation to a sexual nature or pushing for a phone call and/or meeting, it's our job to produce a "twist"- having a parent coming on line, chewing out the person for talking to a minor and threatening to turn over the chat log to the police- in hopes of scaring away with predator. However, if the conversation becomes abusive or threatening, we can turn the logs over to law enforcement for help.

The entire process is very mentally and emotionally draining. Having to sit in front of a computer for hours while a sick, sick individual talks to you about having sex with a child- it's just stomach churning. If I could reach through the screen, I'd strangle those sick bastards!!! There's just no call for hurting a child. The entire time I'm working as a human shield I keep telling myself, at least they're talking to me, and not a child- that's the only thing that gets me through it semi-sane. It's a hard job, but it is very rewarding.

After all of this, child abuse hit close to home. One of my dear "chitlin's" , *we believe*, is being abused. He told a trusted adult that "when your kissing, you're supposed to take off your clothes and rub your butts together". My heart was just broken. As if that wasn't bad enough, yesterday after church while at his friends house, he was in the bedroom with her, and she had off her pants and panties. They're both 5 years old, and , so obviously neither were "molesting" the other, but it's definitely a strong sign that he had been molested. I don't know what to do for him. I want him removed from his mother's home, and placed somewhere, where he can be safe. I'm just so worried about him. He's a smart child with such a good heart, I don't want anything to happen to him. Then, as if things weren't bad enough, I received a phone call a few minutes ago telling me that my cousin Holly, her husband Jimmy, is in congestive heart failure. He's 33 years old, and has congestive heart failure! How does that happen to a 33 year old? This is insane! I can't believe this is happening! We don't have many details yet. It started out with him having trouble breathing and his legs swelling.

I'll keep you posted as I know more... That's the summary of my weekend- not the best, huh. Please keep the child, and my cousin's husband in your prayers. They both need all they can get...