What a mystery Ryan was... He would stand outside of his store, and glance at me. He knew exactly how to look at me to make my heart race. I don't know what it was about Ryan, but I liked him from the moment I saw him. After talking for over four hours, I was completely hooked on him. Things had gone even better than I ever imagined. I just KNEW we were going to be together. He walked me out to my car that night, and made sure I got in my piece of shit Audi 4000 (and I DO mean piece of shit). I don't believe I slept at all that night! I was so excited! I couldn't wait til the next day at work. Unfortunately, he was off.
Things moved so fast from there. On wednesday night, at closing time, he asked me to come over and talk to him. Once again, we talked for hours on end. I was absolutely captivated by him. I can't explain it. He said things that blew my mind. Ryan was by far, one of the most intelligent people I've ever met. Around 11pm or so, we finally walked out to our cars. I'll never forget what he said to me. We were looking up at the stars, and there was one that was a more dense color than the others. He asked me if I knew why it was different from all the rest. Of course, I had no clue. He told me it was because it was traveling further away, instead of heading closer. I couldn't tell you why that's stuck in my mind, but it is. I remember how much I loved looking up at the stars with him. That night, I remember asking him why he had shared with me so many things, personal and impersonal, and he replied, "Because I know you care."
He was right, I did care- far more than I should've. Things were going so perfect- almost TOO perfect. One week to the day we met, we shared another night talking, again. The first few hours were spent inside of his store. The last few, in my car. We were talking about various things, and he asked me something about my ex. I was pretty upset (not with him, but having to talk about my ex), and he asked me for a napkin. I thought he was nuts. He was adamant I got a napkin for him. Finally, after scourging through my car, I found napkin for him. He took the napkin from me, and began making something. I couldn't figure out what he was doing, until he handed me a paper rose. I nearly cried. That was so sweet, and thoughtful of him. He knew just how to bring a smile to my face.
Within a matter of minutes, EVERYTHING changed. The sweet man I thought I knew, became someone I never dreamt he could be. He took two fingers, and pressed them against my throat, and said, "You know, with these two fingers, I could crush your larynx, and you'd be dead. Look around you, Christy, there's no one here to hear you scream, and no one knows you're with me. They wouldn't find your body until the morning." Ok, that did it. I jumped out of my car and began screaming. He was right behind me, and basically pinned me against my car. He kept telling me he was kidding me, that he wasn't serious. I don't think I had ever been that scared in my entire life. It was completely eerie how someone could go from one extreme to the other in such a short time. He layed down in the middle of the parking lot, and told me he wasn't moving until I believed he wasn't crazy.
If I had been smart, I would've gotten in my car, and driven away right then, and never looked back, but of course, I stayed. The rest of the night was normal, well, as normal as things can be for Ryan. I still really cared for him, but I just couldn't shake the feeling I had. I should've ended things with him that night, but I didn't, I couldn't. I kept on.
Once again, I've gotta leave you hanging. Tune in tomorrow, same time, same blog for latest chapter of a "love" from 9 years ago.
Just an FYI, the titles of the stories, reflect a song title that was important to me at that time in my life. I can't help but think of him when I hear them.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Friday, September 29, 2006
Nine Years Ago Today...
I met a man who changed my life. I was 19 years old, and working for Merle Norman Cosmetics. Across the hall from me, was The Tilt, an arcade. I had been watching a guy who worked there for a couple of weeks. Obviously, working for a cosmetic counter, I had to look nice coming to work daily, but since I'd seen him, I was taking extra time to make sure EVERYTHING was perfect. We'd exchange glances from across the hall, but words were never spoken, not until tonight.
At 8:01pm, he walked across the hall. My heart was racing. He looked into my eyes and said, "I like to stalk stalkers." Ok, right then, I not only knew I had been "had", I also knew, I'd met my match. The night before, I had sat in the parking lot, waiting for him to leave work. I wanted to see what kind of car he drove, so that if all possible, I could park next to him. I thought that might be a good way to begin talking to him.
He didn't tell me his name immediately, and I was so enthralled by what he was saying, I didn't even bother to ask. We talked from 8:00 to 9:00 pm, when it was time for us to close our stores. After hurriedly closing, I rushed out, hoping to continue talking to him. He was sitting out on a bench with some of the employees of Ruby Tuesday. I'll never forget, I met Becky Hickman that night, and I'd give anything to be able to find her, she was a dear friend- anyway. After everyone had gone back to their stores, he asked who was going to come with him to hear his life story. Well, it's painfully obvious, I was the one jumped right up to volunteer.
We talked until well after midnight that night. He told me some of the most fascinating, off the wall things, and he did tell me his life story. I knew things about him in the first night, that most people he'd been talking to for months didn't know. I REALLY liked this guy. For weeks, I had been praying for God just to give me a chance with him, if it didn't work, I'd accept it, I just wanted the chance. On September 29th, 1997, I got that chance. It was a night I'll never forget. The guy's name, Ryan Leonard.
Needless to say, since I'm married to another man, things didn't work out between us- but it's a very interesting story to say the least, so I'll continue with more chapters. I had originally planned another post for today, but when I realized what day it is, I had to share this. It's a memory etched in my mind forever.
At 8:01pm, he walked across the hall. My heart was racing. He looked into my eyes and said, "I like to stalk stalkers." Ok, right then, I not only knew I had been "had", I also knew, I'd met my match. The night before, I had sat in the parking lot, waiting for him to leave work. I wanted to see what kind of car he drove, so that if all possible, I could park next to him. I thought that might be a good way to begin talking to him.
He didn't tell me his name immediately, and I was so enthralled by what he was saying, I didn't even bother to ask. We talked from 8:00 to 9:00 pm, when it was time for us to close our stores. After hurriedly closing, I rushed out, hoping to continue talking to him. He was sitting out on a bench with some of the employees of Ruby Tuesday. I'll never forget, I met Becky Hickman that night, and I'd give anything to be able to find her, she was a dear friend- anyway. After everyone had gone back to their stores, he asked who was going to come with him to hear his life story. Well, it's painfully obvious, I was the one jumped right up to volunteer.
We talked until well after midnight that night. He told me some of the most fascinating, off the wall things, and he did tell me his life story. I knew things about him in the first night, that most people he'd been talking to for months didn't know. I REALLY liked this guy. For weeks, I had been praying for God just to give me a chance with him, if it didn't work, I'd accept it, I just wanted the chance. On September 29th, 1997, I got that chance. It was a night I'll never forget. The guy's name, Ryan Leonard.
Needless to say, since I'm married to another man, things didn't work out between us- but it's a very interesting story to say the least, so I'll continue with more chapters. I had originally planned another post for today, but when I realized what day it is, I had to share this. It's a memory etched in my mind forever.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
More Things... That Just Aren't Right...
My Cat Hitting An All Time Low- Laying Down To Eat: 
My Cat, Thinking about Dinner:
My Cat, The Wide Angle View:
My Cat, In Repose:
I hope you enjoyed the cute, furry, loveableness that is, Morris D. Cat. Don't be envious he isn't your cat ;0)
My Cat, Thinking about Dinner:
My Cat, The Wide Angle View:
My Cat, In Repose:
I hope you enjoyed the cute, furry, loveableness that is, Morris D. Cat. Don't be envious he isn't your cat ;0)
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Did You Ever Wonder?
Why lightning bugs butts light up?
How a cockroach can live for 7 days without it's head?
OR
Why it never fails that when you carry your umbrella with you, that it never rains, but when you don't have it, it pours?
Some food for thought. Ok, basically, I'm just bored. It's about time for me to get my happy self in bed, and I'm not happy about it. I HATE going to bed at 9pm, it's like draining my soul or something. Only a few more weeks of this- I HOPE!
I was able to actually make most all of my blog rounds tonight. I have to admit, visiting my blog friends is something I really love to do- and today, there were some really great posts. Just a few that were note-worthy: Pinky, who's little girl is turning 6, had a heartfelt post that brought tears to my eyes. McBlogger's, who ALWAYS cracks me up- this girl has the best sense of humor. I swear, I wish she lived closer! The Rev. Dr. Kate, had an AWESOME post about true religious tolerance. One last that really struck me, was a "newbie" to my blog, Mississippi Songbird, she had a very touching, and uplifting story posted on her blog today.
It's funny how in the blog world, we become a "family" quickly. We often keep our blog friends in our thoughts and prayers- and worry about them just as we worry about our own family. I know I've met some extraordinary people in the past year that I've been blogging. It all started with Chloe', and turned into something much more. I came here just to write, and ended up meeting some people who have changed my life- definitely for the better.
So, I want to extend a big thank you- and lots of hugs to all of my friends. Thanks for the posts that make me smile, think, happy, and everything in between. Much Love...
How a cockroach can live for 7 days without it's head?
OR
Why it never fails that when you carry your umbrella with you, that it never rains, but when you don't have it, it pours?
Some food for thought. Ok, basically, I'm just bored. It's about time for me to get my happy self in bed, and I'm not happy about it. I HATE going to bed at 9pm, it's like draining my soul or something. Only a few more weeks of this- I HOPE!
I was able to actually make most all of my blog rounds tonight. I have to admit, visiting my blog friends is something I really love to do- and today, there were some really great posts. Just a few that were note-worthy: Pinky, who's little girl is turning 6, had a heartfelt post that brought tears to my eyes. McBlogger's, who ALWAYS cracks me up- this girl has the best sense of humor. I swear, I wish she lived closer! The Rev. Dr. Kate, had an AWESOME post about true religious tolerance. One last that really struck me, was a "newbie" to my blog, Mississippi Songbird, she had a very touching, and uplifting story posted on her blog today.
It's funny how in the blog world, we become a "family" quickly. We often keep our blog friends in our thoughts and prayers- and worry about them just as we worry about our own family. I know I've met some extraordinary people in the past year that I've been blogging. It all started with Chloe', and turned into something much more. I came here just to write, and ended up meeting some people who have changed my life- definitely for the better.
So, I want to extend a big thank you- and lots of hugs to all of my friends. Thanks for the posts that make me smile, think, happy, and everything in between. Much Love...
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
So Very, Very Wrong...
We've moved to the "ghetto" building. Our training room is now in the second building. The training room is a lot larger, but I can't say better. The picture you see above, is posted in every stall in the women's bathroom. How sad is it that you're encouraged to wipe yourself with what's "necessary"- I mean, how ghetto can you get! ;0)
Time has been flying! Training is going to be over before I know it. Yesterday, we listened in on some actual phone calls. There's still so much to learn, but I'm VERY thankful, that for the hour I listened, I would've been able to answer the questions the people had asked, and would've known exactly where to find any additional answers. That definitely made me feel good. I think I'm gonna like being out in the call center, versus in the training room. The only thing that's gonna be really sad is most likely, I won't be working with any of my friends from training. There are 40 schedules, and we were told from day one, that we would most likely not be working with anyone we're training with.
Some POSSIBLE good news. NFS has called negotiations with the union to discuss the contract language. I'm TRULY hoping this is the start of serious negotiations, so that they can get back to work soon. I got my information from Sprint today, in regards to signing up for health insurance, and for what I'm going to pay monthly in premiums (that's insurance AND prescription coverage), I'm better off without it. It doesn't really matter, either way, because with my pre-existing conditions, I'm not sure who will insure me anyway. Such is life.
I'm hoping I'll have enough left from my next paycheck to order my halloween costume. I'm either going to be Glenda (from the Wizard of Oz), or Little Red Riding Hood. I haven't completely decided yet. What's your vote?
(For those who were interested in my previous post (about paranormal groups), check ours out at www.hauntmastersclub.com - We've got a lot of information and some great pictures.)
Monday, September 25, 2006
My Weekend...
See Bottom for details.
I didn't stop from the time I got home from work on friday, until I went to bed on sunday night. I had my paranormal group meeting on saturday, and had the best time. We basically discussed the plans for our big Halloween party next month. After our meeting, we went to the South Holston Dam for an very informal investigation. When the dam was built, a cemetery stood on the land where the dam was being built. Legend has it, that most of the graves were NOT relocated, and the dam has high paranormal activity. We didn't exactly pick up any activity, but had a great time. As you can see, we're not exactly right. Michael said we had another "prom pic", we're always posing around water- there's something up with that, but we haven't figured it out yet!
On sunday, I had my company picnic. It left a LOT to be desired. I had been looking forward to it all week long. When we got there, there were only about 50 people, and I work with over 600 people. Ok, no biggie, I assumed it was just early. We went to eat, and my Maryland Fried Chicken was COLD- I mean ICE COLD. There weren't any of the great sides from MFC either- no green beans, okra, mashed potatoes- you get the drift. Ok, my lunch sucked. So, we went to the pool. It was HUGE indoor pool, which was something I was really looking forward to. I had a great time swimming, but didn't know a soul there. Several people from my training class were supposed to be there, but apparently didn't' feel the need to show up. I was really disappointed. Don't get me wrong, swimming was fun, but it wasn't really a "company" activity- everyone kept to themselves, which was really disappointing.
At least I KNOW I'm going to have some good food today. Tiffany, one of my friends from training is cooking for us, and bringing lunch for everyone, that I AM looking forward to! I hope everyone had a good weekend- can't wait to see what ya'll have been up to!
I didn't stop from the time I got home from work on friday, until I went to bed on sunday night. I had my paranormal group meeting on saturday, and had the best time. We basically discussed the plans for our big Halloween party next month. After our meeting, we went to the South Holston Dam for an very informal investigation. When the dam was built, a cemetery stood on the land where the dam was being built. Legend has it, that most of the graves were NOT relocated, and the dam has high paranormal activity. We didn't exactly pick up any activity, but had a great time. As you can see, we're not exactly right. Michael said we had another "prom pic", we're always posing around water- there's something up with that, but we haven't figured it out yet!
On sunday, I had my company picnic. It left a LOT to be desired. I had been looking forward to it all week long. When we got there, there were only about 50 people, and I work with over 600 people. Ok, no biggie, I assumed it was just early. We went to eat, and my Maryland Fried Chicken was COLD- I mean ICE COLD. There weren't any of the great sides from MFC either- no green beans, okra, mashed potatoes- you get the drift. Ok, my lunch sucked. So, we went to the pool. It was HUGE indoor pool, which was something I was really looking forward to. I had a great time swimming, but didn't know a soul there. Several people from my training class were supposed to be there, but apparently didn't' feel the need to show up. I was really disappointed. Don't get me wrong, swimming was fun, but it wasn't really a "company" activity- everyone kept to themselves, which was really disappointing.
At least I KNOW I'm going to have some good food today. Tiffany, one of my friends from training is cooking for us, and bringing lunch for everyone, that I AM looking forward to! I hope everyone had a good weekend- can't wait to see what ya'll have been up to!
Saturday, September 23, 2006
This IS What It Looks Like...
When you learn how to send text messages, and use the camera on your camera phone! Yesterday at work, that's exactly what we did. The pics you see are of me, "a la natural", Jennifer, and Chris. The girl typing on her phone is Tiffany, another of my friends- none of which are offended by me *L*. I'm actually enjoying work a lot more now, even though it is getting to be pretty stressful.
I've got a long weekend ahead of me- gonna be on the go constantly. I have a meeting with my paranormal group today, and tomorrow, after church, my company picnic. I'm gonna have to go back to work to get some rest! *L* I hope everyone has a safe and happy weekend!
I've got a long weekend ahead of me- gonna be on the go constantly. I have a meeting with my paranormal group today, and tomorrow, after church, my company picnic. I'm gonna have to go back to work to get some rest! *L* I hope everyone has a safe and happy weekend!
Friday, September 22, 2006
How Many People...
Just wanted to stay in their nice warm bed this morning, instead of rolling over, and getting up to go to work? Show of hands- (yep, both of mine are high in the air.) As much as I complain about getting up early, and I do hate it- it's actually good for me. I'm on somewhat of a schedule, and that's something I haven't really been on in years. At night, when it's time to go to bed, I don't fool around. I'm typically asleep within 10 minutes of getting in bed. I get up at the same time every day, with the exception of the weekends- I sleep ALL I want then! ;0) So, I guess maybe it's not as bad as I'm making it out to be.
I can't believe I've made it through my second week of training. Last week, things were just dragging on, I thought it would be the longest 7 weeks of my life! Now, I have no idea where the time is actually going! There is so much information to process, that we're not retaining half of what we're learning. One thing that's good, is that we do have a system that we can search while we're on a call for one of those "gray answers".
I'm really looking forward to our company picnic on sunday. I've never been to the center where we're having the picnic/party, but there's an indoor and outdoor swimming pool, basketball court, volleyball- all sorts of activities AND we're having Maryland Fried Chicken! For anyone who's eaten at MFC, you know what I'm talking about! There were people that I worked with at Proffitts, that would gnaw your arm off if you went to MFC and didn't invite them, too!
Time for me to get my happy self off of here and get ready for work. I was sad I didn't get to make my blog rounds last night- I was just so tired I couldn't do it. I'll be catching up with ya'll tonight! :0)
I can't believe I've made it through my second week of training. Last week, things were just dragging on, I thought it would be the longest 7 weeks of my life! Now, I have no idea where the time is actually going! There is so much information to process, that we're not retaining half of what we're learning. One thing that's good, is that we do have a system that we can search while we're on a call for one of those "gray answers".
I'm really looking forward to our company picnic on sunday. I've never been to the center where we're having the picnic/party, but there's an indoor and outdoor swimming pool, basketball court, volleyball- all sorts of activities AND we're having Maryland Fried Chicken! For anyone who's eaten at MFC, you know what I'm talking about! There were people that I worked with at Proffitts, that would gnaw your arm off if you went to MFC and didn't invite them, too!
Time for me to get my happy self off of here and get ready for work. I was sad I didn't get to make my blog rounds last night- I was just so tired I couldn't do it. I'll be catching up with ya'll tonight! :0)
Thursday, September 21, 2006
I'm Happier...
Today was a much better day for me today. Of course, Ms. Offended herself was being quite the hooch. I didn't realize how many people in my class don't like her. Some of the girls, and guys that I'm in the class with, who have been very nice to me, have been upset by her. She's been very critical and rude to them as well. We've just decided to distance ourselves from her, and do the work we're there to do. "Our side of the room" is way ahead in all of our exercises, because we actually work, and focus on why we're there, instead of spending our time talking about other people. Yeah, I know, I'm talking about someone, but they've really hurt my feelings- although, I'm letting it go. If I carry it around, she wins- and I won't let her win.
On a fun note, I got my Sprint phone today. It's the first cell phone I've actually owned on my own. I've been on my mom's plan for like 10 years now. It feels good to have something of my own. My phone is just too cute, it's got a camera, camcorder, internet access- everything. The BEST part is- it's all FREE!!! As long as I'm a Sprint employee, I pay NOTHING for my service! How awesome is that? I'm excited about that.
I swear, I'm absolutely exhausted. After I got home last night from work, I went out to dinner with the ladies from the church. I love them dearly, but don't have a lot in common with anyone but Julie (remember, the passion party on my birthday?) :0) Anyway, the dinner was great, but the conversation was lagging! I can't complain, my dear mother paid for my dinner. Anytime you eat free, you have no room to complain.
I know I'm rambling, but I'm lacking sleep. I just can't catch up. This week has been so busy, and I have a fully planned weekend ahead of me. If I don't make a lot of sense, don't hold it against me! :0)
On a fun note, I got my Sprint phone today. It's the first cell phone I've actually owned on my own. I've been on my mom's plan for like 10 years now. It feels good to have something of my own. My phone is just too cute, it's got a camera, camcorder, internet access- everything. The BEST part is- it's all FREE!!! As long as I'm a Sprint employee, I pay NOTHING for my service! How awesome is that? I'm excited about that.
I swear, I'm absolutely exhausted. After I got home last night from work, I went out to dinner with the ladies from the church. I love them dearly, but don't have a lot in common with anyone but Julie (remember, the passion party on my birthday?) :0) Anyway, the dinner was great, but the conversation was lagging! I can't complain, my dear mother paid for my dinner. Anytime you eat free, you have no room to complain.
I know I'm rambling, but I'm lacking sleep. I just can't catch up. This week has been so busy, and I have a fully planned weekend ahead of me. If I don't make a lot of sense, don't hold it against me! :0)
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Just Blah...
It's been a week at work- apparently I've offended someone- Imagine that. Normally, I would care if I offended someone, especially if I said something that was truly offensive, but since I didn't, I could care less how they feel. Yeah, they reported me out of spite. Needless to say, I'm not in trouble. My trainer felt it was absolutely ridiculous, and took care of the situation. Even though I've only been there a week, I've been there long enough for her to know I wasn't trying to hurt anyone's feelings or *God forbid* offend someone. It's time to start getting real people.
The girl I *offended*, is 20 years old, overweight (granted, I'm one to talk, but the next comment will explain), and comes to work in clothes that are 3 sizes too small, with her boobs hanging out, and when she bends over, you can see her thong and her entire behind. Something I DO NOT WANT TO SEE!!! Have I reported her for this? Absolutely not. It's her perrogative to walk around looking like trash. I just simply overlook it.
Whatever happened to "personal responsibility?" I mean, standing up, and telling someone when you're bothered by something, instead of acting like a two year old and running and tattling to someone else? I mean, if there's one thing I that Sprint loves is, I "Own It." yep, if I say something, make some type of mistake- whatever- I will take responsibility for it. I'm not the type to say, "oh, I didn't say that!" When, in reality, I did. I'll stand up and admit it. I just can't stand a coward, and apparently, I work with a lot of them. That's ok, because I don't plan on keeping this job anyway. Whenever the strike ends, my happy self is outta there. The drive is way too long, and the amount I'm spending on gas is ridiculous. The ONLY reason I'm there now (aside from the NEEDING the money at this point) is health insurance.
Ugh. Gotta go to work. Here's to hoping I have a drama free day!
The girl I *offended*, is 20 years old, overweight (granted, I'm one to talk, but the next comment will explain), and comes to work in clothes that are 3 sizes too small, with her boobs hanging out, and when she bends over, you can see her thong and her entire behind. Something I DO NOT WANT TO SEE!!! Have I reported her for this? Absolutely not. It's her perrogative to walk around looking like trash. I just simply overlook it.
Whatever happened to "personal responsibility?" I mean, standing up, and telling someone when you're bothered by something, instead of acting like a two year old and running and tattling to someone else? I mean, if there's one thing I that Sprint loves is, I "Own It." yep, if I say something, make some type of mistake- whatever- I will take responsibility for it. I'm not the type to say, "oh, I didn't say that!" When, in reality, I did. I'll stand up and admit it. I just can't stand a coward, and apparently, I work with a lot of them. That's ok, because I don't plan on keeping this job anyway. Whenever the strike ends, my happy self is outta there. The drive is way too long, and the amount I'm spending on gas is ridiculous. The ONLY reason I'm there now (aside from the NEEDING the money at this point) is health insurance.
Ugh. Gotta go to work. Here's to hoping I have a drama free day!
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
What It's Like...
I know I've talked about the NFS Strike a lot lately. I don't mean to sound like a broken record, but it's changed my life- drastically. I was one of those people who always "had enough." I never knew the feeling of not having the money to pay the bills, or having to go the grocery store and buy a limited amount of food, and I sure didn't know how it felt to be without insurance, and wondering how in the world I'm going to get my medication, much less health care.
In the blink of an eye, my perfect world changed. There was no more steady, stable income. There was no health insurance. There was no money for anything. I hadn't worked since October of 2005. Aside from the fact I was really sick from then until April of this year, there was no need for me to work. Chris had a wonderful income, and the best insurance you could hope for. I went to the grocery store, and bought whatever I wanted. I went to get my hair and nails done. I went shopping. We took trips, and went out for dinner and a movie. I wanted for nothing.
The day I realized that it was all gone, I was nearly destroyed. I had put so much emphasis on things, and a "life of luxury", that I completely took for granted the things that did matter. The most humbling experience of my life, was going to the grocery store, and barely being able to buy enough food to feed us, because that was all the money I had. I was angry. That wasn't supposed to happen to me. I wasn't supposed to have to live like this. I've always had enough, why is this happening to me now?
I became very depressed. I couldn't go to the doctor, so I had no idea what my insulin levels were, or if anything else was wrong. Day by day, my medicine and injections were depleting, with no way to refill them. My injection and Glucophage alone cost $384.00, and I have five other prescriptions I need as well. I seriously contemplated suicide. I knew I'd be worth more dead than alive. At least Chris could bury me with the life insurance, and pay off the bills- which were mostly my fault to begin with. All rational thinking went out the door. I couldn't see an end to my suffering. I couldn't live like that. Day by day, I woke up disappointed that God didn't take me in my sleep. I had sunk to the lowest point in my life. I was ready for it to be over.
I never in my life imagined I'd have to go to a clinic, and not have to pay for my health care or medicine, because I didn't make enough money. I was so thankful just to be able to have health care, and medicine, but so humiliated because I couldn't pay for the services. These people work really hard, and it's so good of them to see people in situations like mine.
I couldn't truly tell you what changed me. I prayed hard every night. Even though I felt things were shit, I kept thanking God for what I did have, and was truly trying to be happy with what I had- although, I kept wanting more. I think we're programmed to want more. No matter what we have, it's never enough. There's always something else we "need" or "think we need."
I finally decided, it was time to do something for myself. My Daddy always told me, you can't depend on anyone to take care of you, but you. It was then, that I stopped feeling sorry for myself, and got out and started looking for something other than the dead end job I had. It took long enough, but I was finally hired at Sprint. Yeah, I held a few "transition" jobs in between, just to get me by until I found one that would provide. I'll have health insurance in 3 weeks, and I'm making enough money to pay the bills, and be able to actually buy groceries.
I'm getting out of my hell, but I can't help but think of those, for whom, it's a way of life. I often think of the sweet lady who worked at McDonald's. She was a customer of mine when I was working at Save-A-Lot in high school. She worked her fingers to the bone. She NEVER missed a day of work, and barely got enough food stamps to cover her food. If the truth be told, it wasn't enough to remotely feed her family. I know she lived paycheck to paycheck, struggling even when she was paid. I can't imagine how it feels to know, it's not gonna get any better? That, "this is as good as it gets."
I'm telling you now, I have a deep respect for the working poor. They are stronger people than I'll ever be. Someone who works their ass off, and has nothing to show for it, but perhaps a roof over their head, and some food on their table, are VERY strong people. In society today, we're so spoiled. I think we feel a sense of entitlement, because we've grown up with so much. I mean, for me, internet access, getting my nails done, going out to eat- even to McDonald's, was something I took for granted. Now, I take NOTHING for granted. I'm thankful when I eat a .99 double cheeseburger (AKA: Penny Meat Patty), when I have enough money to buy my family food at the grocery store, when I'm able to pay my bills so that the bill collectors aren't calling my house from 8am til 9pm. I'm thankful for each day I have.
I know how hard surviving is this day in time, and know what it takes to survive- truly survive.
In the blink of an eye, my perfect world changed. There was no more steady, stable income. There was no health insurance. There was no money for anything. I hadn't worked since October of 2005. Aside from the fact I was really sick from then until April of this year, there was no need for me to work. Chris had a wonderful income, and the best insurance you could hope for. I went to the grocery store, and bought whatever I wanted. I went to get my hair and nails done. I went shopping. We took trips, and went out for dinner and a movie. I wanted for nothing.
The day I realized that it was all gone, I was nearly destroyed. I had put so much emphasis on things, and a "life of luxury", that I completely took for granted the things that did matter. The most humbling experience of my life, was going to the grocery store, and barely being able to buy enough food to feed us, because that was all the money I had. I was angry. That wasn't supposed to happen to me. I wasn't supposed to have to live like this. I've always had enough, why is this happening to me now?
I became very depressed. I couldn't go to the doctor, so I had no idea what my insulin levels were, or if anything else was wrong. Day by day, my medicine and injections were depleting, with no way to refill them. My injection and Glucophage alone cost $384.00, and I have five other prescriptions I need as well. I seriously contemplated suicide. I knew I'd be worth more dead than alive. At least Chris could bury me with the life insurance, and pay off the bills- which were mostly my fault to begin with. All rational thinking went out the door. I couldn't see an end to my suffering. I couldn't live like that. Day by day, I woke up disappointed that God didn't take me in my sleep. I had sunk to the lowest point in my life. I was ready for it to be over.
I never in my life imagined I'd have to go to a clinic, and not have to pay for my health care or medicine, because I didn't make enough money. I was so thankful just to be able to have health care, and medicine, but so humiliated because I couldn't pay for the services. These people work really hard, and it's so good of them to see people in situations like mine.
I couldn't truly tell you what changed me. I prayed hard every night. Even though I felt things were shit, I kept thanking God for what I did have, and was truly trying to be happy with what I had- although, I kept wanting more. I think we're programmed to want more. No matter what we have, it's never enough. There's always something else we "need" or "think we need."
I finally decided, it was time to do something for myself. My Daddy always told me, you can't depend on anyone to take care of you, but you. It was then, that I stopped feeling sorry for myself, and got out and started looking for something other than the dead end job I had. It took long enough, but I was finally hired at Sprint. Yeah, I held a few "transition" jobs in between, just to get me by until I found one that would provide. I'll have health insurance in 3 weeks, and I'm making enough money to pay the bills, and be able to actually buy groceries.
I'm getting out of my hell, but I can't help but think of those, for whom, it's a way of life. I often think of the sweet lady who worked at McDonald's. She was a customer of mine when I was working at Save-A-Lot in high school. She worked her fingers to the bone. She NEVER missed a day of work, and barely got enough food stamps to cover her food. If the truth be told, it wasn't enough to remotely feed her family. I know she lived paycheck to paycheck, struggling even when she was paid. I can't imagine how it feels to know, it's not gonna get any better? That, "this is as good as it gets."
I'm telling you now, I have a deep respect for the working poor. They are stronger people than I'll ever be. Someone who works their ass off, and has nothing to show for it, but perhaps a roof over their head, and some food on their table, are VERY strong people. In society today, we're so spoiled. I think we feel a sense of entitlement, because we've grown up with so much. I mean, for me, internet access, getting my nails done, going out to eat- even to McDonald's, was something I took for granted. Now, I take NOTHING for granted. I'm thankful when I eat a .99 double cheeseburger (AKA: Penny Meat Patty), when I have enough money to buy my family food at the grocery store, when I'm able to pay my bills so that the bill collectors aren't calling my house from 8am til 9pm. I'm thankful for each day I have.
I know how hard surviving is this day in time, and know what it takes to survive- truly survive.
Monday, September 18, 2006
I'm Insane...
Not to mention, still sore from saturday's sunburn. I'm going to catch hell when I go to work. Since I have to get up at 5am to go to work, I tend to go, "a la natural". Yep, I go to work with absolutely no makeup on. It's really funny, the first day of training, we all came to work looking so nice. All of the women had makeup on, our hair was fixed perfectly, we had on suits- you get the point. When they told us we could wear shorts, denim, ect- that it would be a casual work environment, EVERYTHING changed. We all came to work the next day in shorts, jumpsuits, jeans, and NO MAKEUP. I mean, having to get up that early does a number on you, especially when you aren't used to it. On any given typical day, at 5am, I would've typically been asleep for about 2 hours at the most, sometimes only an hour. Now, my happy self is going to bed at 9pm, and talk about someone who is ticked off if I don't make it to bed then. It's killing me. I SWORE I'd never get up that early again (after high school). Oh well, I've blown that one all to hell.
As for work. Things are going a little better, but extremely confusing. Let me explain. There are no, "black or white answers, everything is in the "gray area". Ok. It explains a lot. The REALLY intelligent (and I'm using that term sarcastically) HR woman I got really re-affirmed that for me. I can see why people will be calling us, cussing us out. I was ready to cuss out the HR lady because I just wanted a straight up answer. Here, we're probably not going to give you one. There are MANY different answers for any given problem.
We're going to be spending 7 weeks in training. 5 weeks in classroom, 4 weeks in lab. Apparently, that's only touching the surface. From what our trainer said, it will take us at least 6 months to feel remotely comfortable with what we're doing. In the meantime, we'll be confusing everyone who calls in.
Our system that we're training on SUCKS!!! I sincerely hope that when we get out on the floor, that it won't be half as confusing. Take for example an "exercise" we had on friday. She gave us a plan, and a list of specific things to find about said plan. Of course, we got the hardest plan- the "Fair and Flexible", not "Fair and Flexible America". The information we were able to find, wasn't even remotely what we needed to answer the questions- thus comes the gray area. I got so frustrated!
I really like my trainer, and co-workers, we're having a good time, I'm just so bogged down with so much information. There's no way we're going to be able to retain a 1/4 of what we're learning, and even if we do, we probably won't know when to use it *L*. I now completely understand why I'm making such good money, because I'm going to put up with more than I've ever bargained for!
As for work. Things are going a little better, but extremely confusing. Let me explain. There are no, "black or white answers, everything is in the "gray area". Ok. It explains a lot. The REALLY intelligent (and I'm using that term sarcastically) HR woman I got really re-affirmed that for me. I can see why people will be calling us, cussing us out. I was ready to cuss out the HR lady because I just wanted a straight up answer. Here, we're probably not going to give you one. There are MANY different answers for any given problem.
We're going to be spending 7 weeks in training. 5 weeks in classroom, 4 weeks in lab. Apparently, that's only touching the surface. From what our trainer said, it will take us at least 6 months to feel remotely comfortable with what we're doing. In the meantime, we'll be confusing everyone who calls in.
Our system that we're training on SUCKS!!! I sincerely hope that when we get out on the floor, that it won't be half as confusing. Take for example an "exercise" we had on friday. She gave us a plan, and a list of specific things to find about said plan. Of course, we got the hardest plan- the "Fair and Flexible", not "Fair and Flexible America". The information we were able to find, wasn't even remotely what we needed to answer the questions- thus comes the gray area. I got so frustrated!
I really like my trainer, and co-workers, we're having a good time, I'm just so bogged down with so much information. There's no way we're going to be able to retain a 1/4 of what we're learning, and even if we do, we probably won't know when to use it *L*. I now completely understand why I'm making such good money, because I'm going to put up with more than I've ever bargained for!
Sunday, September 17, 2006
This Is What Happens...
When you forget your sunscreen: 
I had such a great time! I FINALLY got to use my season pass to Splash Country today. Sad, isn't it? It's halfway through September, and I'm just NOW getting to use the pass. Better late than never, I suppose. I met Jen, Steve, and Caleb down there. It was a "spur of the moment" thing. I went last year, but wasn't able to have that great of a time, because it was SO packed. There weren't that many people there today, and I was able to do so much more. Jen and family left at 3pm, and I stayed until 5pm. I didn't realize just how fried I was, until I got home. It was most definitely worth it, but right now, I look and feel like Larry the Lobster, or Eugene Krabs, take your pick *LOL* In the meantime, enjoy the pics!
I had such a great time! I FINALLY got to use my season pass to Splash Country today. Sad, isn't it? It's halfway through September, and I'm just NOW getting to use the pass. Better late than never, I suppose. I met Jen, Steve, and Caleb down there. It was a "spur of the moment" thing. I went last year, but wasn't able to have that great of a time, because it was SO packed. There weren't that many people there today, and I was able to do so much more. Jen and family left at 3pm, and I stayed until 5pm. I didn't realize just how fried I was, until I got home. It was most definitely worth it, but right now, I look and feel like Larry the Lobster, or Eugene Krabs, take your pick *LOL* In the meantime, enjoy the pics!
Friday, September 15, 2006
Agree to Disagree?
*See bottom of blog for my response*
I receieved this comment from someone local who has been visiting my blog like crazy lately:
"I'm afraid I'm going to have to be the one to disagree with all this. I can certainly respect your opinion on the subject and supporting your husband and his co-workers. The point of a strike is to demonstrate to the company just how valuable the employees are, if the employees are on strike on the company can't function properly that shows they are worth what they are asking for, if the employees are on the strike and the company can hire new people and still produce, then the unionized employees are not worth what they are asking for. I think it is wrong to harrass the people who have crossed the picket line, since you aren't in their shoes and don't have to support their families, they are simply doing what they have to do. It is wrong to harrass the new hires, since they are only doing a job and they feel the pay/benefits are adequate for the work. The salaried employees who are peforming the jobs the hourly employees used to perform are simply doing their jobs and have no affiliation with the union in the first place. The guards are also just doing their job, they have lives and families to support just like anyone else. Bottom line is it is not right to tell someone how to run their life and what a fair wage for them is, if you don't feel you're getting fair treatment, there's always the option of finding a new job."
This is where they came from:
Domain Name charter.com ? (Commercial)
IP Address 71.80.19.# (CHARTER COMMUNICATIONS)
ISP CHARTER COMMUNICATIONS
Location Continent : North America
Country : United States (Facts)
State : Tennessee
City : Piney Flats
Lat/Long : 36.4405, -82.3495 (Map)
Language English (United States)
en-us
Operating System Microsoft WinXP
Browser Firefox
Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 5.1; en-US; rv:1.8.0.6) Gecko/20060728 Firefox/1.5.0.6
Javascript version 1.5
Monitor Resolution : 800 x 600
Color Depth : 32 bits
Time of Visit Sep 14 2006 9:36:05 pm
Last Page View Sep 14 2006 9:55:35 pm
Visit Length 19 minutes 30 seconds
Page Views 3
Referring URL http://www.google.co...zilla:en-US:official
Search Engine google.com
Search Words roger birchfield spoke
Visit Entry Page http://miss1999.blogspot.com/
Visit Exit Page http://miss1999.blog...rsday-afternoon.html
Out Click
Time Zone UTC-5:00
Visitor's Time Sep 14 2006 9:36:05 pm
Visit Number 3,062
Obviously, this person has never worked at NFS a day in their life, NOR DO THEY UNDERDSTAND WHAT THIS STRIKE IS ABOUT. THAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE.
"I think it is wrong to harrass the people who have crossed the picket line, since you aren't in their shoes and don't have to support their families, they are simply doing what they have to do"
Who do you think you are to tell me about suffering? I believe I know all too well what that feels like. Do you know how it feels to worry about whether or not you're going to live because you can't afford your medication? Hmmmmmm, or how you're going to pay the bills? And God FORBID should get sick? Because there was no way to pay for medical care? How dare you assume I AND THE REST OF THE UNION EMPLOYEES/FAMILIES DON'T KNOW HOW IT FEELS! We DO. Perhaps you saw the nice picture of me and article in the Johnson City Press about a week ago? I think that pretty well sums things up about how I feel.
On to the job issues. Do you have a clue as to what REALLY goes on in NFS? Do you realize that any Joe-Shmoe waking in off the street, can't produce fuel? That you have to pass not one, but two govenment clearances in addtion to extensive training. Currently, THERE ARE NO QUALIFIED people operating in fuel. Yes, some of them have the "ability" to produce fuel, but have no pratical knowledge of production. Just ask anyone who's currently actually working in the plant about how production is going.
You know, I'd love to know WHAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW FOR A FACT ABOUT THIS STRIKE? I have ALL OF THE PAPERWORK AND DOCUMENTS TO BACK EVERY STATEMENT THAT I'VE MADE. This strike isn't about money, it isn't about a person's ability to produce fuel or anything else. It's about the fact that taking someone's penison isn't right. As for the insurance, if you're making a product that the United States Navy CANNOT function without, should you not have adequate benefits for this service? Absolutely. MOST IMPORTANTLY- the Union is fighting for contract language, that will PROTECT THE SAFETY OF NOT ONLY THEMSELVES, BUT ALL PEOPLE OF UPPER EAST TENNESSEE, WESTERN NORTH CAROLINA AND SOUTHWEST VIRGINA. Not just ANYONE CAN DO THIS JOB. As much as NFS might like for people to think so.
As far as scabs go, they have NO RESPECT FOR THEMSELVES OR ANYONE ELSE. I desperately need insurance, without my medication and injections, I will die. Of all people, my husband SHOULD HAVE BEEN one of the one's to cross the picket line. He didn't, because he has princpals. He stands up for what he believes in. He has respect for himself, and his co-workers.
Harassment, you want to talk about harassment? How about the salaried employees who were LAUGHING at the strikers? Is that proper? This has been the MOST PEACEFUL STRIKE NFS HAS EVER SEEN.
Last, but certainly not least- You know my name, Christy Younce-Rach. I stand up for my thoughts and beliefs. You hide behind the name anonymous. I think it shows who's proud of what they believe, and who's hiding behind the scenes.
I receieved this comment from someone local who has been visiting my blog like crazy lately:
"I'm afraid I'm going to have to be the one to disagree with all this. I can certainly respect your opinion on the subject and supporting your husband and his co-workers. The point of a strike is to demonstrate to the company just how valuable the employees are, if the employees are on strike on the company can't function properly that shows they are worth what they are asking for, if the employees are on the strike and the company can hire new people and still produce, then the unionized employees are not worth what they are asking for. I think it is wrong to harrass the people who have crossed the picket line, since you aren't in their shoes and don't have to support their families, they are simply doing what they have to do. It is wrong to harrass the new hires, since they are only doing a job and they feel the pay/benefits are adequate for the work. The salaried employees who are peforming the jobs the hourly employees used to perform are simply doing their jobs and have no affiliation with the union in the first place. The guards are also just doing their job, they have lives and families to support just like anyone else. Bottom line is it is not right to tell someone how to run their life and what a fair wage for them is, if you don't feel you're getting fair treatment, there's always the option of finding a new job."
This is where they came from:
Domain Name charter.com ? (Commercial)
IP Address 71.80.19.# (CHARTER COMMUNICATIONS)
ISP CHARTER COMMUNICATIONS
Location Continent : North America
Country : United States (Facts)
State : Tennessee
City : Piney Flats
Lat/Long : 36.4405, -82.3495 (Map)
Language English (United States)
en-us
Operating System Microsoft WinXP
Browser Firefox
Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 5.1; en-US; rv:1.8.0.6) Gecko/20060728 Firefox/1.5.0.6
Javascript version 1.5
Monitor Resolution : 800 x 600
Color Depth : 32 bits
Time of Visit Sep 14 2006 9:36:05 pm
Last Page View Sep 14 2006 9:55:35 pm
Visit Length 19 minutes 30 seconds
Page Views 3
Referring URL http://www.google.co...zilla:en-US:official
Search Engine google.com
Search Words roger birchfield spoke
Visit Entry Page http://miss1999.blogspot.com/
Visit Exit Page http://miss1999.blog...rsday-afternoon.html
Out Click
Time Zone UTC-5:00
Visitor's Time Sep 14 2006 9:36:05 pm
Visit Number 3,062
Obviously, this person has never worked at NFS a day in their life, NOR DO THEY UNDERDSTAND WHAT THIS STRIKE IS ABOUT. THAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE.
"I think it is wrong to harrass the people who have crossed the picket line, since you aren't in their shoes and don't have to support their families, they are simply doing what they have to do"
Who do you think you are to tell me about suffering? I believe I know all too well what that feels like. Do you know how it feels to worry about whether or not you're going to live because you can't afford your medication? Hmmmmmm, or how you're going to pay the bills? And God FORBID should get sick? Because there was no way to pay for medical care? How dare you assume I AND THE REST OF THE UNION EMPLOYEES/FAMILIES DON'T KNOW HOW IT FEELS! We DO. Perhaps you saw the nice picture of me and article in the Johnson City Press about a week ago? I think that pretty well sums things up about how I feel.
On to the job issues. Do you have a clue as to what REALLY goes on in NFS? Do you realize that any Joe-Shmoe waking in off the street, can't produce fuel? That you have to pass not one, but two govenment clearances in addtion to extensive training. Currently, THERE ARE NO QUALIFIED people operating in fuel. Yes, some of them have the "ability" to produce fuel, but have no pratical knowledge of production. Just ask anyone who's currently actually working in the plant about how production is going.
You know, I'd love to know WHAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW FOR A FACT ABOUT THIS STRIKE? I have ALL OF THE PAPERWORK AND DOCUMENTS TO BACK EVERY STATEMENT THAT I'VE MADE. This strike isn't about money, it isn't about a person's ability to produce fuel or anything else. It's about the fact that taking someone's penison isn't right. As for the insurance, if you're making a product that the United States Navy CANNOT function without, should you not have adequate benefits for this service? Absolutely. MOST IMPORTANTLY- the Union is fighting for contract language, that will PROTECT THE SAFETY OF NOT ONLY THEMSELVES, BUT ALL PEOPLE OF UPPER EAST TENNESSEE, WESTERN NORTH CAROLINA AND SOUTHWEST VIRGINA. Not just ANYONE CAN DO THIS JOB. As much as NFS might like for people to think so.
As far as scabs go, they have NO RESPECT FOR THEMSELVES OR ANYONE ELSE. I desperately need insurance, without my medication and injections, I will die. Of all people, my husband SHOULD HAVE BEEN one of the one's to cross the picket line. He didn't, because he has princpals. He stands up for what he believes in. He has respect for himself, and his co-workers.
Harassment, you want to talk about harassment? How about the salaried employees who were LAUGHING at the strikers? Is that proper? This has been the MOST PEACEFUL STRIKE NFS HAS EVER SEEN.
Last, but certainly not least- You know my name, Christy Younce-Rach. I stand up for my thoughts and beliefs. You hide behind the name anonymous. I think it shows who's proud of what they believe, and who's hiding behind the scenes.
How Many Times...
Do we think things are terrible, until they change? I was reading a post on a friend's blog, and it inspired me. She and her partner had separated. When things are in the "end stage", you don't see anything but the negative- even if you still love the person, you see more of the bad, than the good. Once they're gone, the thing that's in the front of your mind, is when things were good. I can relate to that all too well. I think we all can. I mean, how many times have you felt like a situation was bringing you down, and in the end, it was for the best to disconnect from it, only to realize, that maybe things weren't as bad as you thought?
I've had this happen more times than I can admit- in relationships, jobs, friendships, you name it, it's probably happened to me. Once we get in a "comfort zone", it's so easy to focus more on the bad, than the good. Take my job at Proffits' for example. I absolutely adored my co-workers, they were my family. We had so much fun together. Of course, we all fought from time to time, but it wasn't anything that couldn't be resolved in a matter of hours (typically). Looking back, I really loved my job. At the time, did I think so? HELL NO! I focused on the fact that I hated being screamed at daily.
"Sales!!! Credit!!!" Big Daddy would scream every morning, and pound papers on my counter. I'd pound them right back, telling him that I would get hem when I got them. The day after Thanksgiving, I wanted to die. I remember sitting in the break room at noon, sobbing, because I was so tired, and so stressed. I had no idea how I was going to get through the holiday season. Every night, until December 25th, I came home tired. My body aching, and my mind racing. All I could think about was, "how can I get out of that hellhole?"
Little did I know, in a matter of a year, I'd give anything to be back in that hellhole. There were times that were hard. There were times that were stressful. Would I do it again? Absolutely. I miss my friends. I miss my customers. I miss Big Daddy, and God knows I miss Verna. The ONLY good thing I can say about the Belk transition, is that it took place after Verna was in the hospital, and ultimately, had passed away. I'm thankful she didn't have to see the store she loved so much, ripped apart at the seams. No, it wasn't much, but it was ours. We didn't realize just how much we loved it, until it was gone.
I left the friday before they took out the cosmetic counters. I couldn't handle watching them take them out. I get emotional just thinking about Big Daddy crying as he had to send Kathy, Little Bit, and Holly down to the other store. I remember the tears streaming down my cheeks the last time I walked out our employee door, and the last drive home, knowing I'd never be going back to that store again, as an employee.
For so long, I focused on how bad things were. I focused on the bad, not the good. Of course, hindsight is 20/20. If I had it all to do over again, I'd cherish every day I had there. I would've worried much less, and laughed much more. Although there was always a smile on my face, I would bitch constantly. If I could take it back, I would.
That's just one of the many times I've thought things were much worse than they really were. Ultimately, was it for the best? I can't say that I feel it was, but because of my health failing so miserable last fall, I wouldn't have had a choice anyway. So, perhaps it was for the best.
Is this the case with every situation? No. There are times things ARE as bad as we think they are- there will always be those occasions. Am I one of the people who will go to the extreme with my emotions, absolutely. I'm guilty of letting them rule my life. I guess the whole point of this post is- a "Do as I say, Not Do as I Do". Don't waste your time focusing on the bad. There's a reason we remember the good.
(Deb, I don't want you to think I was writing this to preach to you, or influence you to make any type of decision that's not for the best. You just inspired me so much, to take a look inside at some of the things I've done in the past. *Hugs*)
I've had this happen more times than I can admit- in relationships, jobs, friendships, you name it, it's probably happened to me. Once we get in a "comfort zone", it's so easy to focus more on the bad, than the good. Take my job at Proffits' for example. I absolutely adored my co-workers, they were my family. We had so much fun together. Of course, we all fought from time to time, but it wasn't anything that couldn't be resolved in a matter of hours (typically). Looking back, I really loved my job. At the time, did I think so? HELL NO! I focused on the fact that I hated being screamed at daily.
"Sales!!! Credit!!!" Big Daddy would scream every morning, and pound papers on my counter. I'd pound them right back, telling him that I would get hem when I got them. The day after Thanksgiving, I wanted to die. I remember sitting in the break room at noon, sobbing, because I was so tired, and so stressed. I had no idea how I was going to get through the holiday season. Every night, until December 25th, I came home tired. My body aching, and my mind racing. All I could think about was, "how can I get out of that hellhole?"
Little did I know, in a matter of a year, I'd give anything to be back in that hellhole. There were times that were hard. There were times that were stressful. Would I do it again? Absolutely. I miss my friends. I miss my customers. I miss Big Daddy, and God knows I miss Verna. The ONLY good thing I can say about the Belk transition, is that it took place after Verna was in the hospital, and ultimately, had passed away. I'm thankful she didn't have to see the store she loved so much, ripped apart at the seams. No, it wasn't much, but it was ours. We didn't realize just how much we loved it, until it was gone.
I left the friday before they took out the cosmetic counters. I couldn't handle watching them take them out. I get emotional just thinking about Big Daddy crying as he had to send Kathy, Little Bit, and Holly down to the other store. I remember the tears streaming down my cheeks the last time I walked out our employee door, and the last drive home, knowing I'd never be going back to that store again, as an employee.
For so long, I focused on how bad things were. I focused on the bad, not the good. Of course, hindsight is 20/20. If I had it all to do over again, I'd cherish every day I had there. I would've worried much less, and laughed much more. Although there was always a smile on my face, I would bitch constantly. If I could take it back, I would.
That's just one of the many times I've thought things were much worse than they really were. Ultimately, was it for the best? I can't say that I feel it was, but because of my health failing so miserable last fall, I wouldn't have had a choice anyway. So, perhaps it was for the best.
Is this the case with every situation? No. There are times things ARE as bad as we think they are- there will always be those occasions. Am I one of the people who will go to the extreme with my emotions, absolutely. I'm guilty of letting them rule my life. I guess the whole point of this post is- a "Do as I say, Not Do as I Do". Don't waste your time focusing on the bad. There's a reason we remember the good.
(Deb, I don't want you to think I was writing this to preach to you, or influence you to make any type of decision that's not for the best. You just inspired me so much, to take a look inside at some of the things I've done in the past. *Hugs*)
Thursday, September 14, 2006
I've Been Tagged...
*edited for Melinda's enjoyment. See bottom of post for cute, furry, loveableness- the 40lbs legend, Morris Cat*
Sorry it's taken me so long, I'm a little slow sometimes! *L* I've been tagged by Redneck Girl.
The rules are simple. Write 8 facts about yourself. Ok, here goes.
1. I'm deathly afraid of "bed bugs." I have to spray my bed down with Febreeze at night before I get in it, because I believe that it kills any bed bugs or potential bed bugs.
2. I've dyed my hair red, blonde, black, brown, and purple.
3. I have over 30 Louis Vuitton handbags, and want more (that's really sad).
4. I take pride in the fact that my nickname is Monger.
5. I have a 40lbs cat named Morris.
6. I hate mayonnaise, but love ranch dressing.
7. I cried the day they closed Krispy Kreem Doughnuts in Bristol, TN.
8. When I was 16, I was smoking a cigarette in my cousin Joey's car, and dropped it on my favorite dress, burning a hole in it. Luckily, it was on a "flower" on the dress, and wasn't noticeable.
I hope ya'll enjoyed my strange, quirky answers. As if you didn't think I was nuts enough already. I'm tagging Jenni-Monger, McBlogger (because this girl cracks me up on a daily basis, I know her answers will have me rolling), Riccie, Pinkie, Deb, Kristi and anyone else who hasn't been tagged- Go for it, I tagged ya! :0)
Sorry it's taken me so long, I'm a little slow sometimes! *L* I've been tagged by Redneck Girl.
The rules are simple. Write 8 facts about yourself. Ok, here goes.
1. I'm deathly afraid of "bed bugs." I have to spray my bed down with Febreeze at night before I get in it, because I believe that it kills any bed bugs or potential bed bugs.
2. I've dyed my hair red, blonde, black, brown, and purple.
3. I have over 30 Louis Vuitton handbags, and want more (that's really sad).
4. I take pride in the fact that my nickname is Monger.
5. I have a 40lbs cat named Morris.
6. I hate mayonnaise, but love ranch dressing.
7. I cried the day they closed Krispy Kreem Doughnuts in Bristol, TN.
8. When I was 16, I was smoking a cigarette in my cousin Joey's car, and dropped it on my favorite dress, burning a hole in it. Luckily, it was on a "flower" on the dress, and wasn't noticeable.
I hope ya'll enjoyed my strange, quirky answers. As if you didn't think I was nuts enough already. I'm tagging Jenni-Monger, McBlogger (because this girl cracks me up on a daily basis, I know her answers will have me rolling), Riccie, Pinkie, Deb, Kristi and anyone else who hasn't been tagged- Go for it, I tagged ya! :0)
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
A "Weighty" Subject...
Some of you know, many don't, that in 2003 I was diagnosed with PCOS/IRS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome with Insulin Resistance Syndrome), a condition for which there is no cure. From the doctor's calculations, I was born with this horrible condition. PCOS/IRS causes excessive weight gain, with absolutely NO way to lose it UNTIL your insulin levels are controlled. Fatigue, hair loss, acne, gastro-intestinal upset, depression, infertility, and excessive hair growth are only a FEW of the symptoms that those with PCOS or PCOS/IRS suffer with daily.
Over a period of 23 years, I steadily gained weight in excess of 300lbs. Yep, I was a big girl. Now, I know you've heard many overweight people say, "But I don't eat much!" or "I don't eat enough to justify being this size." I was one of those people, who was telling the absolute truth. ANYONE who knows me, I rarely eat a regular portion of food at one sitting. I eat far less than anyone over, under or at their ideal weight. I struggled constantly trying to lose weight.
I've always been a very positive person. Although overweight my entire life, I was always very confidant, and popular. People loved me because I was beautiful inside, and out- I just happened to have a little extra padding on the outside. In high school, being a cheerleader meant EVERYTHING to me. I cheered in junior high, and wanted to cheer in high school. I knew the high school crowd was FAR different from the middle school I had gone to, and my extra pounds just wouldn't cut it.
The summer before my sophomore year, I worked my ass off. I ate less than 500 calories a day, and LITERALLY took two step aerobics classes to try to lose weight. By the end of the summer, I looked GREAT! I had gone from a size 24 to a size 12! But ask me how much weight I lost? NOT ONE POUND. Nope, I starved myself, worked out like a fiend, and NEVER LOST A POUND. I turned EVERYTHING I HAD into muscle. My legs looked like some of those women body builders.
I wasn't thin by any stretch of the imagination, but I was definitely fit enough to cheer. My dreams were shattered one faithful day in P.E. To make a VERY long story short, a friend of mine was in front of me in our auxiliary gym, and didn't know I was behind him. He went back to hit the volleyball, and slammed me into the wall, and I proceeded to hit the concrete floor. A cyst that had been growing inside of my body for 16 years ruptured. Because of the cyst, I was told I could NEVER be involved in any sports or activities where I would be risking a fall. Cheerleading was out, so was volleyball, and softball.
I became so depressed. The following year, the aerobics place went out of business, and I began to gain weight rapidly. I felt horrible. I was always tired, my periods were never regular, and I never felt good. This continued until I was married. I looked like a side of beef on my wedding day. I was the heaviest I've ever been the day I walked down the aisle. I can't even stand to look at my wedding pictures now because I was so big.
Anyway, shortly after getting married, I went for my annual pap smear and well-woman exam. That's when Dr. Brenda Crowder, God Bless this woman, actually began to probe to find out what was wrong with me. She was the FIRST doctor to NOT ASSUME I WAS LAZY BECAUSE I'M OVERWEIGHT. She ran test after test. Finally, she came back with a diagnosis. PCOS with IRS- severely advanced. IF it had been caught and diagnosed when I was 14, 16, or even 18, things may have never gotten this bad.
My body produces enough insulin for 3 to 4 healthy average people- and on it's own, absorbs NONE of it. Because my body does not absorb insulin, I cannot metabolize food on my own, thus causing an extreme weight gain. The PCOS/IRS has wreaked havoc on my body. Daily, I take two injections to make my body produce only a certain amount of insulin, 1000mgs or Glucophage to make my body absorb the insulin that I do produce, 40mgs of Nexium, so that I don't throw up so violently that I can't speak everytime I take the Glucophage (although it does still happen from time to time), 75mgs of Effexor, because the of the chemical imbalance in my brain from the PCOS messing with hormones, and let us not forget, the 10mgs of an Ace Inhibitor to protect my kidneys, because all of the drugs I'm on to help my body function "normally" will damage my kidneys.
I feel really bad for getting down from time to time about this. I know there are people in this world who are in a hell of a lot worse shape than me. I know there are people who have cancer or AIDS that would give anything if they only had PCOS/IRS, and I can't say that I'd blame them there.
I'd just give anything to remember what it's like to feel good- to actually feel like getting out of your bed after 8 hours of sleep. To know what it's like not to have to take an injection and pills everytime you eat, or worry about whether or not you'll be able to afford your medications if you should lose your insurance.
I know I shouldn't complain about my medications and injections. Because of them, I've lost nearly 100lbs in the past year. Since my body is now functioning somewhere close to "normal", the weight is falling off. It's a good feeling to be able to wear the things you did in high school, and to have people who haven't seen you in years to say how good you look. What's bad, is that you don't feel good, physically. My spirit is still young, but my body is so old.
I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. For all of my bloggers who are women, or have mothers, daughters, sisters, or female friends who are overweight, and honestly not sure why- tell them to get tested for PCOS. Don't wait until you get like me, where it's too late to reverse anything- where only the symptoms can be treated. Get help, it is out there.
Over a period of 23 years, I steadily gained weight in excess of 300lbs. Yep, I was a big girl. Now, I know you've heard many overweight people say, "But I don't eat much!" or "I don't eat enough to justify being this size." I was one of those people, who was telling the absolute truth. ANYONE who knows me, I rarely eat a regular portion of food at one sitting. I eat far less than anyone over, under or at their ideal weight. I struggled constantly trying to lose weight.
I've always been a very positive person. Although overweight my entire life, I was always very confidant, and popular. People loved me because I was beautiful inside, and out- I just happened to have a little extra padding on the outside. In high school, being a cheerleader meant EVERYTHING to me. I cheered in junior high, and wanted to cheer in high school. I knew the high school crowd was FAR different from the middle school I had gone to, and my extra pounds just wouldn't cut it.
The summer before my sophomore year, I worked my ass off. I ate less than 500 calories a day, and LITERALLY took two step aerobics classes to try to lose weight. By the end of the summer, I looked GREAT! I had gone from a size 24 to a size 12! But ask me how much weight I lost? NOT ONE POUND. Nope, I starved myself, worked out like a fiend, and NEVER LOST A POUND. I turned EVERYTHING I HAD into muscle. My legs looked like some of those women body builders.
I wasn't thin by any stretch of the imagination, but I was definitely fit enough to cheer. My dreams were shattered one faithful day in P.E. To make a VERY long story short, a friend of mine was in front of me in our auxiliary gym, and didn't know I was behind him. He went back to hit the volleyball, and slammed me into the wall, and I proceeded to hit the concrete floor. A cyst that had been growing inside of my body for 16 years ruptured. Because of the cyst, I was told I could NEVER be involved in any sports or activities where I would be risking a fall. Cheerleading was out, so was volleyball, and softball.
I became so depressed. The following year, the aerobics place went out of business, and I began to gain weight rapidly. I felt horrible. I was always tired, my periods were never regular, and I never felt good. This continued until I was married. I looked like a side of beef on my wedding day. I was the heaviest I've ever been the day I walked down the aisle. I can't even stand to look at my wedding pictures now because I was so big.
Anyway, shortly after getting married, I went for my annual pap smear and well-woman exam. That's when Dr. Brenda Crowder, God Bless this woman, actually began to probe to find out what was wrong with me. She was the FIRST doctor to NOT ASSUME I WAS LAZY BECAUSE I'M OVERWEIGHT. She ran test after test. Finally, she came back with a diagnosis. PCOS with IRS- severely advanced. IF it had been caught and diagnosed when I was 14, 16, or even 18, things may have never gotten this bad.
My body produces enough insulin for 3 to 4 healthy average people- and on it's own, absorbs NONE of it. Because my body does not absorb insulin, I cannot metabolize food on my own, thus causing an extreme weight gain. The PCOS/IRS has wreaked havoc on my body. Daily, I take two injections to make my body produce only a certain amount of insulin, 1000mgs or Glucophage to make my body absorb the insulin that I do produce, 40mgs of Nexium, so that I don't throw up so violently that I can't speak everytime I take the Glucophage (although it does still happen from time to time), 75mgs of Effexor, because the of the chemical imbalance in my brain from the PCOS messing with hormones, and let us not forget, the 10mgs of an Ace Inhibitor to protect my kidneys, because all of the drugs I'm on to help my body function "normally" will damage my kidneys.
I feel really bad for getting down from time to time about this. I know there are people in this world who are in a hell of a lot worse shape than me. I know there are people who have cancer or AIDS that would give anything if they only had PCOS/IRS, and I can't say that I'd blame them there.
I'd just give anything to remember what it's like to feel good- to actually feel like getting out of your bed after 8 hours of sleep. To know what it's like not to have to take an injection and pills everytime you eat, or worry about whether or not you'll be able to afford your medications if you should lose your insurance.
I know I shouldn't complain about my medications and injections. Because of them, I've lost nearly 100lbs in the past year. Since my body is now functioning somewhere close to "normal", the weight is falling off. It's a good feeling to be able to wear the things you did in high school, and to have people who haven't seen you in years to say how good you look. What's bad, is that you don't feel good, physically. My spirit is still young, but my body is so old.
I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. For all of my bloggers who are women, or have mothers, daughters, sisters, or female friends who are overweight, and honestly not sure why- tell them to get tested for PCOS. Don't wait until you get like me, where it's too late to reverse anything- where only the symptoms can be treated. Get help, it is out there.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Everything Is NOT What It's Cracked Up To Be...
Yep, I'm talking about my new job. I know, I change jobs more than most people change underwear. I'm working for a Sprint Call Center. Sounds easy enough, right? I mean, all I'm going to be doing, is answering billing questions, and trouble shooting on problems with people's phones. I'm making 10.34 an hour, plus commission for any "add on's" I sale. Sounds like a dream come true- WRONG!!!
I found out today why you make said amount of money- BECAUSE you put up with massive bull-shit!!! It's bad enough that I have to get up at 5:00am every morning. I mean, typically, I would be in bed about, oh, two hours then. So now, I'm going to bed by 9pm, which sucks majorly.
Then, to make matters worse, I find out that everything I was told when I was hired, was complete and total BS!!! Our schedules are subject to change, at ANY TIME WITHOUT NOTICE. We are open 365 days a year- and are required to work any and ALL holidays that fall on our shift, including, but not limited to Easter and Christmas. I DON'T THINK SO!!! I don't believe ANY Christian should be forced to work on either of these holidays. I told them, that under NO CIRCUMSTANCES do I believe in working on these days. They asked me if I told HR when I was hired. I informed them no, because I had NO idea that these type of call centers were open 365 days a year.
I was just irate. Then, when they continually harped on "YOU MUST BE HERE ALL 7 WEEKS OF TRAINING WITHOUT MISSING OR BEING TARDY", I was ready to pull my hair out. They preached this for OVER 2 hours. Two hours of saying nothing but we have to be there. I mean, it's not like they're speaking to people who's IQ is below 70. We get it already.
The final straw came when the HR woman, who drives me NUTS- the same one who told me I had to get a new license because it said Younce-Rach for my last name instead of Rach- because of the Patriot Act. Well, the Patriot Act can kiss the area on my body where the sun don't shine!!! Anyway, she had EVERYTHING still listed as Younce-Rach for my last name today, after she made SUCH A BIG DEAL about getting it changed. I could've throttled her!!!
So, am I enjoying my new job. That's a big negatory. The ONLY positive is that in 30 days, I have much needed health insurance. Please God, let the NFS strike end. I can't take much more of this!!!
Hope you enjoyed my colorful rant about Sprint. The moral of this story is: If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
I found out today why you make said amount of money- BECAUSE you put up with massive bull-shit!!! It's bad enough that I have to get up at 5:00am every morning. I mean, typically, I would be in bed about, oh, two hours then. So now, I'm going to bed by 9pm, which sucks majorly.
Then, to make matters worse, I find out that everything I was told when I was hired, was complete and total BS!!! Our schedules are subject to change, at ANY TIME WITHOUT NOTICE. We are open 365 days a year- and are required to work any and ALL holidays that fall on our shift, including, but not limited to Easter and Christmas. I DON'T THINK SO!!! I don't believe ANY Christian should be forced to work on either of these holidays. I told them, that under NO CIRCUMSTANCES do I believe in working on these days. They asked me if I told HR when I was hired. I informed them no, because I had NO idea that these type of call centers were open 365 days a year.
I was just irate. Then, when they continually harped on "YOU MUST BE HERE ALL 7 WEEKS OF TRAINING WITHOUT MISSING OR BEING TARDY", I was ready to pull my hair out. They preached this for OVER 2 hours. Two hours of saying nothing but we have to be there. I mean, it's not like they're speaking to people who's IQ is below 70. We get it already.
The final straw came when the HR woman, who drives me NUTS- the same one who told me I had to get a new license because it said Younce-Rach for my last name instead of Rach- because of the Patriot Act. Well, the Patriot Act can kiss the area on my body where the sun don't shine!!! Anyway, she had EVERYTHING still listed as Younce-Rach for my last name today, after she made SUCH A BIG DEAL about getting it changed. I could've throttled her!!!
So, am I enjoying my new job. That's a big negatory. The ONLY positive is that in 30 days, I have much needed health insurance. Please God, let the NFS strike end. I can't take much more of this!!!
Hope you enjoyed my colorful rant about Sprint. The moral of this story is: If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
Monday, September 11, 2006
I Believe...
There isn't a single person alive, over the age of 10, that doesn't remember where they were 5 years ago today. I was sitting at my desk in Tri-Cities Nissan, ready to pull my hair out because the phone wouldn't stop ringing. There was a television in the showroom, in which I could only see, but not hear. I got pretty good at reading lips, especially since I didn't like missing As The World Turns. On this particular day, everything I had taken for granted, came tumbling down.
As I answered the phone, and watched Good Morning America, something changed. Something happened, that would change our lives forever. I remember the breaking news, seeing the plane crash into the World Trade Center. My first thought was, "How can someone be so stupid that they can't see a building!!!" I was angry, because I thought someone was stupid. Oh, they were stupid alright. I just had no idea HOW stupid.
When I realized that it was an attack by terrorist, it rocked me to the core. I couldn't believe it. HOW could this happen to US? The United States, the most powerful country in the world, brought to it's knees in a matter of seconds. I remember watching the second plane hit the second tower. When they tumbled to the ground, I believe my heart did as well. It wasn't until later, that I learned about the Pentagon, and the heroic measures taken of those on flight 93.
I couldn't imagine what those people were feeling. The fear, the anger, the shock, the terror, and worst of all, knowing you were going to die. I was haunted by the images of the husband and wife, holding hands jumping from the building together. The images of the firemen and policemen who were overwhelmed as they tried in desperation to help those in need.
I've never been to New York, Pennsylvania, or DC. I can't claim to know or even begin to know the feeling of loss and pain these people felt on that day. I can't even begin to say I understand their anger, sorrow, confusion and pain. You can't possibly understand unless you were there. What I can understand is the pain that America as a whole felt on that day. We all felt our foundation had been moved. Everything we had come to hold dear, our precious freedom and safety had been compromised. It was then, we realized that we must stand together, united to support one another.
My thoughts and prayers go out to all who lost their lives on September 11th, 2001, and all who survived, but are still bearing the scars of the greatest tragedy that has taken place in my lifetime. God Bless America...
As I answered the phone, and watched Good Morning America, something changed. Something happened, that would change our lives forever. I remember the breaking news, seeing the plane crash into the World Trade Center. My first thought was, "How can someone be so stupid that they can't see a building!!!" I was angry, because I thought someone was stupid. Oh, they were stupid alright. I just had no idea HOW stupid.
When I realized that it was an attack by terrorist, it rocked me to the core. I couldn't believe it. HOW could this happen to US? The United States, the most powerful country in the world, brought to it's knees in a matter of seconds. I remember watching the second plane hit the second tower. When they tumbled to the ground, I believe my heart did as well. It wasn't until later, that I learned about the Pentagon, and the heroic measures taken of those on flight 93.
I couldn't imagine what those people were feeling. The fear, the anger, the shock, the terror, and worst of all, knowing you were going to die. I was haunted by the images of the husband and wife, holding hands jumping from the building together. The images of the firemen and policemen who were overwhelmed as they tried in desperation to help those in need.
I've never been to New York, Pennsylvania, or DC. I can't claim to know or even begin to know the feeling of loss and pain these people felt on that day. I can't even begin to say I understand their anger, sorrow, confusion and pain. You can't possibly understand unless you were there. What I can understand is the pain that America as a whole felt on that day. We all felt our foundation had been moved. Everything we had come to hold dear, our precious freedom and safety had been compromised. It was then, we realized that we must stand together, united to support one another.
My thoughts and prayers go out to all who lost their lives on September 11th, 2001, and all who survived, but are still bearing the scars of the greatest tragedy that has taken place in my lifetime. God Bless America...
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Crisis of Faith...
*Warning, this post may be controversial for some, although it is based upon my opinions and perception of things, I hope that everyone take it as such. In NO way is it meant to offend any. We're all friends here, friends, with different thoughts and opinions*
Today, church started out like every other sunday in the Episcopal church. We went in, prayed, and sat silently until the service began. After the scripture readings were finished, and a few hymns in between, came the sermon. I don't believe I've ever heard Father Harry give a bad sermon. He'll touch on topics that focus on life today, and life in Biblical times- and how they are intermixed. The one thing I've always loved about the Episcopal church is that we weren't "preached to." We weren't told, "you're going to hell!" or forced to make choices in politics, social status, and other things that might be otherwise controversial.
Many churches focus on abortion. Now, please do not be offended if you are pro-life and/or you attend a church who takes a stand on abortion. For me, I believe that's between God, and the person who has had and/or considering such procedure. Is it for me? Nope. But I've never walked in the shoes of a pregnant rape victim, or child who has been raped by her father, grandfather- you get the drift. It's commonly know that as a whole, the Christian Church *I mean ALL churches of the Christian faith* don't condone abortion. However, in the Episcopal church, it isn't something that's talked about. Typically, we don't focus on pushing those type of choices (pro-life or pro-choice) down someone's throat.
When Father Harry began speaking about making moral choices, he made some very good points. He spoke about racism, which, yes- we do need to speak out about. We need to stand up for ALL people, regardless of their skin color. Then, he began with abortion. Ok. I'm cool with the fact that he's pro-life. I'm not cool with him standing up there, telling me that life begins at conception, and that abortion is morally wrong, and we need to stand up against it.
Now, I can hear my pro-life friends now, they're probably ready to strangle me. Let me explain. The reason I'm not cool with this, is because, not everyone in this world is a Christian. As much as I wish we ALL were, the fact of the matter still stands, that we all have free-will, and because we have free-will, some will choose to follow Jesus, and others won't. I don't want someone who isn't a Christian, forcing their thoughts and beliefs on me, and I refuse to force my thoughts and beliefs upon them.
Do I believe life begins at conception? I don't know. I don't know when life begins. For me, I believe in order to truly be alive, you must breathe on your own. Do I believe people who are alive on life support are alive- no. There's a vessel there, breathing by a machine, trapping a soul that, for all intents and purposes, should be going on to be with the Lord (we hope, depending upon their personal convictions).
Do I believe abortion needs to be legal? Absolutely. People need choices. It goes back to what I said earlier. It's not for me, but then again, I've never walked in the shoes of a victim of rape or incest. I know, many will say all life is precious- and this is true, but for me, it's like this: I believe ALL babies go to heaven. I don't believe God casts ANY child into hell REGARDLESS of the faith of their parents. So, if life does begin and conception, and the baby is aborted, it's getting a one way trip to Heaven- Do not pass go, do not feel pain, sorrow, sin, any sort of affliction, go straight to Heaven- I'd take Heaven. To have NEVER had to have felt the pain and suffering of this world would be a true blessing to me. But that's just me.
Regardless, of what side you take, there are pros and cons to both. It's a heated battle that can never be won- because you can't convince someone who's pro-choice that they're wrong, and you can't convince someone who's pro-life they're wrong, because to a certain extent, they're both right. Ultimately, it comes down to the decision of a woman, and her relationship with God. To me, it's not for the church to tell you yes or no. It's not up to society to tell you yes or no. It's not up to the government to tell you yes or no. It's up to you and God. Only God can judge those who have abortions. Thank God, my name is Christy.
Today, church started out like every other sunday in the Episcopal church. We went in, prayed, and sat silently until the service began. After the scripture readings were finished, and a few hymns in between, came the sermon. I don't believe I've ever heard Father Harry give a bad sermon. He'll touch on topics that focus on life today, and life in Biblical times- and how they are intermixed. The one thing I've always loved about the Episcopal church is that we weren't "preached to." We weren't told, "you're going to hell!" or forced to make choices in politics, social status, and other things that might be otherwise controversial.
Many churches focus on abortion. Now, please do not be offended if you are pro-life and/or you attend a church who takes a stand on abortion. For me, I believe that's between God, and the person who has had and/or considering such procedure. Is it for me? Nope. But I've never walked in the shoes of a pregnant rape victim, or child who has been raped by her father, grandfather- you get the drift. It's commonly know that as a whole, the Christian Church *I mean ALL churches of the Christian faith* don't condone abortion. However, in the Episcopal church, it isn't something that's talked about. Typically, we don't focus on pushing those type of choices (pro-life or pro-choice) down someone's throat.
When Father Harry began speaking about making moral choices, he made some very good points. He spoke about racism, which, yes- we do need to speak out about. We need to stand up for ALL people, regardless of their skin color. Then, he began with abortion. Ok. I'm cool with the fact that he's pro-life. I'm not cool with him standing up there, telling me that life begins at conception, and that abortion is morally wrong, and we need to stand up against it.
Now, I can hear my pro-life friends now, they're probably ready to strangle me. Let me explain. The reason I'm not cool with this, is because, not everyone in this world is a Christian. As much as I wish we ALL were, the fact of the matter still stands, that we all have free-will, and because we have free-will, some will choose to follow Jesus, and others won't. I don't want someone who isn't a Christian, forcing their thoughts and beliefs on me, and I refuse to force my thoughts and beliefs upon them.
Do I believe life begins at conception? I don't know. I don't know when life begins. For me, I believe in order to truly be alive, you must breathe on your own. Do I believe people who are alive on life support are alive- no. There's a vessel there, breathing by a machine, trapping a soul that, for all intents and purposes, should be going on to be with the Lord (we hope, depending upon their personal convictions).
Do I believe abortion needs to be legal? Absolutely. People need choices. It goes back to what I said earlier. It's not for me, but then again, I've never walked in the shoes of a victim of rape or incest. I know, many will say all life is precious- and this is true, but for me, it's like this: I believe ALL babies go to heaven. I don't believe God casts ANY child into hell REGARDLESS of the faith of their parents. So, if life does begin and conception, and the baby is aborted, it's getting a one way trip to Heaven- Do not pass go, do not feel pain, sorrow, sin, any sort of affliction, go straight to Heaven- I'd take Heaven. To have NEVER had to have felt the pain and suffering of this world would be a true blessing to me. But that's just me.
Regardless, of what side you take, there are pros and cons to both. It's a heated battle that can never be won- because you can't convince someone who's pro-choice that they're wrong, and you can't convince someone who's pro-life they're wrong, because to a certain extent, they're both right. Ultimately, it comes down to the decision of a woman, and her relationship with God. To me, it's not for the church to tell you yes or no. It's not up to society to tell you yes or no. It's not up to the government to tell you yes or no. It's up to you and God. Only God can judge those who have abortions. Thank God, my name is Christy.
My Saturday...
I'm proud to show the pictures of, my Godson, Caleb's first soccer game.
In between games, he took a moment to show his little brother and mother love.
There he goes! Heading for the goal!
Stealing the ball from the opposing team! Way to go, Caleb!!!
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Changing a Lightbulb...
How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
Charismatic : Only 1
Hands are already in the air.
Pentecostal : 10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of
darkness.
Presbyterians : None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic : None
Candles only.
Baptists : At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the
change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken .
Episcopalians: 3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk
about how much better the old one was.
Mormons : 5
One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do
it.
Unitarians :
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the
need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that
light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a
modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in
which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including
incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally
valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists : Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are
loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of
your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.
Nazarene : 6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None
Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish :
What's a light bulb?
I thought there was something there for everyone to laugh at good- The Episcopalian- it's so true! *L* Enjoy!
Charismatic : Only 1
Hands are already in the air.
Pentecostal : 10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of
darkness.
Presbyterians : None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic : None
Candles only.
Baptists : At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the
change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken .
Episcopalians: 3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk
about how much better the old one was.
Mormons : 5
One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do
it.
Unitarians :
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the
need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that
light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a
modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in
which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including
incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally
valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists : Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are
loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of
your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.
Nazarene : 6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None
Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish :
What's a light bulb?
I thought there was something there for everyone to laugh at good- The Episcopalian- it's so true! *L* Enjoy!
Friday, September 08, 2006
My Thursday Afternoon...
I think this pretty much says it all. At 3pm on thursday, we went to a "Community Support Rally and Dinner" for the United Steelworkers (NFS Strikers) or Erwin. 
Thanks to the people and vendors of the Tri-Cities, we were able to have a really nice cookout. 
As you can see, there were quite a few people who showed up to show their support, not to mention eat *L*
I decided, I couldn't miss this opportunity. The cars you see here, are the people who are crossing the picket line daily to work. Most are non-union, salaried employees- however, there are some scabs as well. I don't know which are which, don't really care- I just wanted to exploit them on the internet. It's because they won't stand united, that EVERYONE can't return to work. 
A few words were spoken by Roger Birchfield, the Local United Steelworkers President. 
There were petitions to sign, protesting against the employment of unqualified persons producing nuclear products. Something that is VERY important for this area. Although what my husband did at NFS is classified (so technically, I have no clue), I know that if one move is made wrong, upper East Tennessee will not be here. We wouldn't even hear the gun fire. 
Of course, my happy self was right up there, signing away. I'm such a camera hog. 
Dry Creek Medical Center had a booth as well. I'm so thankful to them for all they've done for us. They provided me with my medicine and health care for less than $25.00. They've been really good to all of the employees and their families during this difficult time. We are eternally grateful to them for all they've done. 
This is me with Rick Trent. He's a democratic candidate for Congress. He came to show his support for the Union and it's employees. As you know, I love Democrats, and anyone who's going to help support us is tops to me! I spoke as well, but I didn't feel the need to post that picture since I began to cry speaking. Everyone was talking about how thankful they were to the community- and we are, I am very thankful for all they've done. I just wanted it to be known, that WE needed to do more to keep the strike in the media. We need to be IN THEIR FACES. People don't need to forget that we're suffering. We're not the only one's suffering, soon, the United States Navy will suffer, when they aren't able to get their fuel. Without that fuel, there will be no protection on our waters. There will be no protection anywhere but land. I don't know if people don't realize that, or if they're just choosing to look the other way- but it's here, and it's real. It's time for a fair contract. It's time this strike ended.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Annoyance...
Are there things that just annoy you to no end? I mean, things that just make your skin crawl, and your blood boil when you think about them? I think we've all got something that gets on our nerves. Some of mine, for instance, is the Bob Corker commercials. For those of you who don't live in Tennessee, you'll have no idea what I'm talking about, but you're VERY fortunate. Bob Corker is the Republican candidate for senate. Ok, yeah, ya'll know I'm a die hard Democrat, but that's not the reason I despise Bob Corker so much. On EVERY one of his ads, he brags to no end about himself- and not a damn thing to do with government. It's always, "I started my own business out of a truck at age 16"- wonderful, here's a cookie- now tell me about what you're going to do for ME. The man drives me nuts. If he beats Harold Ford Jr. I think I'll shoot myself.
While we're on commercials, how about the Vlasic Pickle commercial? Cute kids, but when the little girl says, "It's a Valasic Pickle" I want to scream- it's a VLASIC pickle, not a VALASIC pickle- Ugh!!! My OCD rears it's ugly head big time.
Words and phrases. I absolutely cannot stand the phrase, "If you will." Whenever someone says that, I ask them, "But what if I won't?" I think the hatred of that phrase came from a priest we had about 7 years ago. He had EVERYONE snowed, but me. Not trying to "toot my own horn", but I couldn't stand this man. There was something about him I just didn't like- and felt really bad, because he was a, "man of God." Well, turns out, I was right. He basically turned our plain ol' Episcopal church into a "new age haven", teaching crazy stuff, and constantly said, "if you will." Well, I did, I left our church until he was gone- that was the ONLY time in 28 years I've ever left my church. Thought you might enjoy that little tidbit of information while I ranted about "if you will" *L*.
The last words I'm going to rant about are "whilst", "booyah", "poingent", and "bittersweet". I'd wipe all of those words out of existence if I could. Don't ask me why, but when I hear people say these words, it puts me in a bad mood.
I know this post has to be an absolute scream to everyone who's read it. I know I'm insane. I take full responsibility for that- but take responsibility for nothing if I haven't had my
Effexor. Thanks for reading my rant, and in the wise words of Blanche Devereux, "Share With Me!!!"
While we're on commercials, how about the Vlasic Pickle commercial? Cute kids, but when the little girl says, "It's a Valasic Pickle" I want to scream- it's a VLASIC pickle, not a VALASIC pickle- Ugh!!! My OCD rears it's ugly head big time. Words and phrases. I absolutely cannot stand the phrase, "If you will." Whenever someone says that, I ask them, "But what if I won't?" I think the hatred of that phrase came from a priest we had about 7 years ago. He had EVERYONE snowed, but me. Not trying to "toot my own horn", but I couldn't stand this man. There was something about him I just didn't like- and felt really bad, because he was a, "man of God." Well, turns out, I was right. He basically turned our plain ol' Episcopal church into a "new age haven", teaching crazy stuff, and constantly said, "if you will." Well, I did, I left our church until he was gone- that was the ONLY time in 28 years I've ever left my church. Thought you might enjoy that little tidbit of information while I ranted about "if you will" *L*.
The last words I'm going to rant about are "whilst", "booyah", "poingent", and "bittersweet". I'd wipe all of those words out of existence if I could. Don't ask me why, but when I hear people say these words, it puts me in a bad mood.
I know this post has to be an absolute scream to everyone who's read it. I know I'm insane. I take full responsibility for that- but take responsibility for nothing if I haven't had my
Effexor. Thanks for reading my rant, and in the wise words of Blanche Devereux, "Share With Me!!!"
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Too Much Fun...
I borried (a FINE Southern word- the word of the day as a matter of fact- meaning to Borrow something) from Sans. I thought it would be fun- Enjoy, and share your answers with me :0)
1) If you could change your name, would you? If so, to what?
Savannah, Sabrina, Cinnamon, something insane like that.
2) What is one thing you'd change about yourself if you could?
I'd definitely want the desire to shop and spend money to go away. I love to shop, and God knows I don't NEED anything else, but I want everything I see.
3) What's one thing you wouldn't change about yourself?
My heart, and faith in God.
4) What's the best decision you ever made in your life?
Hmmmmmmm, that would require a lot of thought.
5) If you could have dinner with 5 people (living or dead) who would they be?
Mother Teresa
Steve and Teri Erwin
Elizabeth Short
Courtney Love
Joan Osborne
6) What's one thing you HAVE to do before you die?
Stay in one of those cute little huts on the ocean in Tahiti, and see Easter Island- but I'd settle for getting into Swingle Mansion in JC.
7) What's the best vacation you ever took?
You'd think it would be my huge tour of Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone, The Badlands, all of that fun stuff from the Midwest/West- but it's not. It was the much needed time away from home this summer with my Aunt Judy- we went to Myrtle Beach, and I appreciated it more than anything in my life.
8) What's the best advice your mom ever gave you?
Never depend on a man to take care of you.
9) What is your biggest phobia?
Don't laugh- bed bugs. I have to febreeze my bed EVERY NIGHT before I get into it. I have this theory that febreeze kills the bed bugs.
10) Who is the hottest (as in sexy) actor in Hollywood?
Ugh- none of them. There haven't been any fine men acting in movies in years *sighs*
11) For $100 would you pull the wings off of a butterfly?
Butterfly, no- Bees, absolutely- I hate those damn things.
12) Do you have a living will or would you sign one?
I have one- I refuse to end up like poor Terry Schiavo. If the circumstance ever arises, I will die with grace and dignity. I will not lay like a vegetable.
1) If you could change your name, would you? If so, to what?
Savannah, Sabrina, Cinnamon, something insane like that.
2) What is one thing you'd change about yourself if you could?
I'd definitely want the desire to shop and spend money to go away. I love to shop, and God knows I don't NEED anything else, but I want everything I see.
3) What's one thing you wouldn't change about yourself?
My heart, and faith in God.
4) What's the best decision you ever made in your life?
Hmmmmmmm, that would require a lot of thought.
5) If you could have dinner with 5 people (living or dead) who would they be?
Mother Teresa
Steve and Teri Erwin
Elizabeth Short
Courtney Love
Joan Osborne
6) What's one thing you HAVE to do before you die?
Stay in one of those cute little huts on the ocean in Tahiti, and see Easter Island- but I'd settle for getting into Swingle Mansion in JC.
7) What's the best vacation you ever took?
You'd think it would be my huge tour of Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone, The Badlands, all of that fun stuff from the Midwest/West- but it's not. It was the much needed time away from home this summer with my Aunt Judy- we went to Myrtle Beach, and I appreciated it more than anything in my life.
8) What's the best advice your mom ever gave you?
Never depend on a man to take care of you.
9) What is your biggest phobia?
Don't laugh- bed bugs. I have to febreeze my bed EVERY NIGHT before I get into it. I have this theory that febreeze kills the bed bugs.
10) Who is the hottest (as in sexy) actor in Hollywood?
Ugh- none of them. There haven't been any fine men acting in movies in years *sighs*
11) For $100 would you pull the wings off of a butterfly?
Butterfly, no- Bees, absolutely- I hate those damn things.
12) Do you have a living will or would you sign one?
I have one- I refuse to end up like poor Terry Schiavo. If the circumstance ever arises, I will die with grace and dignity. I will not lay like a vegetable.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Friendship Is Blind...
I've been reflecting a lot about some of the dear friendships I have and have had throughout the years. I have a very diverse group of friends to say the least. I have friends of all races, color, creeds, and religions. Gay and straight, black and white, large and small, they can all be found in my circle of friends. One thing I'm so thankful for, is that I was raised to judge people by their hearts, and not their outsides. I chose my friends based upon their merits, not what color they were, who they slept with, or what God they worshiped.
Jen, is my best friend- a truly insane monger. We've been through thick and thin together. Momma once said, "You'd lie, and Jen would swear to it." She's absolutely right. There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do for her. We've been in some hellatious fights over the years, but have always found our way back to each other. We were pretty much what you'd call WILD girls. There was no dare we wouldn't take, or no rule we wouldn't break. We'd stand up for each other no matter what. You couldn't ask for a better friend.
Ebony, AKA: Gigi, one of the craziest friends I've ever had. I met Ebony in high school. We had French I and II together. When she first saw me, she thought I'd be stuck up, and a snob- she told me she never thought we'd end up being the best of friends. I've always had so much fun with her. From taking the Lincoln around the block, and SWEARING to her daddy we didn't take it, to going to Fazoli's every friday- we did it all.
Our friendship wasn't the easiest. A teacher at school, who we'll call Mrs. R, didn't like the fact that I was friends with Ebony. She would constantly ask Ebony why she was friends with me. This woman was "black", and I'm using that term loosely, because I don't think the African-American community would claim her- or any other community for that matter. Anyway, I over-heard Mrs. R, giving another teacher hell, accusing them of being racist. There wasn't a racist bone in Coach H's body. He was a good Christian man who loved ALL people. Where I'm going with this- Mrs. R screamed out that he probably thought she was all about some fried chicken and watermelon. I looked at Ebony and told her- "I sure do! I thought everybody did!" I had no idea that was supposed to be a racist remark. Hell, I thought everybody south of the Mason Dixon line loved fried chicken, watermelon, pecan pie- You get my drift. It's just good ol' Southern comfort food, doesn't have anything to do with race.
Needless to say, Ebony and I are still good friends. We didn't pay any attention to Mrs. R, or other ignorant people who judged us by the color of our skin. We don't have time for all that- there's MANY more things in this world to worry about than the color of someone's skin.
I can't forget Justin, Jake, Michael, Jeremy, and Deb. My gay and lesbian friends. They're each one so dear to me. I have so much fun when I'm with them (granted, I only see Deb here online, but I always love reading her blog, comments and e-mails). From, "Give It Up For Drivers ED"- a famous Jeremy quote, to "Penny Meat Patty", and Deb's never ending battle with OCD, Depression, and all of the things I struggle with daily, too, there's never a dull moment. No matter what we do, we always end up having a blast together- as well as learning a lot from each other.
So many people are judgmental of my gay/lesbian friends. They are constantly condemning of them and their lifestyle- like it's a choice to be gay. They didn't choose to be gay anymore than I chose to be straight, or have PCOS. It's who you are. Like I've always said, "I don't care who you're sleeping with, as long as it's not my man!" I can't judge how anyone lives their life. God knows I live a FAR from perfect life. I love people, and it's up to God to judge each of us at our time of passing- it's not up to us to pass judgment on each other.
That brings me to the point of this post. True friendship is blind. It sees no discrimination. It sees only the heart of the other person. I'm thankful for ALL of my friends, black and white, gay and straight, Christian and Pagan- I'm thankful each and every one of you are in my life!
Jen, is my best friend- a truly insane monger. We've been through thick and thin together. Momma once said, "You'd lie, and Jen would swear to it." She's absolutely right. There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do for her. We've been in some hellatious fights over the years, but have always found our way back to each other. We were pretty much what you'd call WILD girls. There was no dare we wouldn't take, or no rule we wouldn't break. We'd stand up for each other no matter what. You couldn't ask for a better friend.
Ebony, AKA: Gigi, one of the craziest friends I've ever had. I met Ebony in high school. We had French I and II together. When she first saw me, she thought I'd be stuck up, and a snob- she told me she never thought we'd end up being the best of friends. I've always had so much fun with her. From taking the Lincoln around the block, and SWEARING to her daddy we didn't take it, to going to Fazoli's every friday- we did it all.
Our friendship wasn't the easiest. A teacher at school, who we'll call Mrs. R, didn't like the fact that I was friends with Ebony. She would constantly ask Ebony why she was friends with me. This woman was "black", and I'm using that term loosely, because I don't think the African-American community would claim her- or any other community for that matter. Anyway, I over-heard Mrs. R, giving another teacher hell, accusing them of being racist. There wasn't a racist bone in Coach H's body. He was a good Christian man who loved ALL people. Where I'm going with this- Mrs. R screamed out that he probably thought she was all about some fried chicken and watermelon. I looked at Ebony and told her- "I sure do! I thought everybody did!" I had no idea that was supposed to be a racist remark. Hell, I thought everybody south of the Mason Dixon line loved fried chicken, watermelon, pecan pie- You get my drift. It's just good ol' Southern comfort food, doesn't have anything to do with race.
Needless to say, Ebony and I are still good friends. We didn't pay any attention to Mrs. R, or other ignorant people who judged us by the color of our skin. We don't have time for all that- there's MANY more things in this world to worry about than the color of someone's skin.
I can't forget Justin, Jake, Michael, Jeremy, and Deb. My gay and lesbian friends. They're each one so dear to me. I have so much fun when I'm with them (granted, I only see Deb here online, but I always love reading her blog, comments and e-mails). From, "Give It Up For Drivers ED"- a famous Jeremy quote, to "Penny Meat Patty", and Deb's never ending battle with OCD, Depression, and all of the things I struggle with daily, too, there's never a dull moment. No matter what we do, we always end up having a blast together- as well as learning a lot from each other.
So many people are judgmental of my gay/lesbian friends. They are constantly condemning of them and their lifestyle- like it's a choice to be gay. They didn't choose to be gay anymore than I chose to be straight, or have PCOS. It's who you are. Like I've always said, "I don't care who you're sleeping with, as long as it's not my man!" I can't judge how anyone lives their life. God knows I live a FAR from perfect life. I love people, and it's up to God to judge each of us at our time of passing- it's not up to us to pass judgment on each other.
That brings me to the point of this post. True friendship is blind. It sees no discrimination. It sees only the heart of the other person. I'm thankful for ALL of my friends, black and white, gay and straight, Christian and Pagan- I'm thankful each and every one of you are in my life!
Monday, September 04, 2006
RIP: Steve Irwin
BRISBANE, Australia - Steve Irwin, the Australian television personality and environmentalist known as the "Crocodile Hunter," was killed Monday by a stingray during a diving expedition, Australian media said. He was 44. Irwin was filming an underwater documentary on the Great Barrier Reef in northeastern Queensland state when the accident occurred, Sydney's The Daily Telegraph newspaper reported on its Web site.
The Australian Broadcasting Corp. said Irwin was diving near Low Isles near the resort town of Port Douglas, about 1,260 miles north of Brisbane.
A helicopter carrying paramedics flew to the island, but he died from a stingray barb to the heart, ABC reported on its Web site.
Telephone calls to Australia Zoo, Irwin's zoo in southern Queensland, were not immediately answered.
Irwin is famous for his enthusiasm for wildlife and his catchcry "Crikey!" in his television program "Crocodile Hunter," which was first broadcast in Australia in 1992 and has aired around the world on the Discovery channel.
He rode his image into a feature film, and developed the Australia Zoo as a tourist attraction.
This just KILLS ME!!! I loved the "Crocodile Man"- My heart just bleeds for his wife and two small children he left behind.
*Photo from Animal Planet.com, Story from Yahoo*
Fun and Random Stories...
In honor of my friends, I figured I'd share some wild and wacky stories with you- not to mention some famous quotes- Enjoy!
-In high school, as soon as I could drive, I went to my friend Ebony's house all the time. We always used the kitchen door to go in the house, and at least a couple of times a week, I'd see a cast iron skillet sitting on the stove with the prettiest, golden biscuits I've ever seen. Well, I was fascinated at how those biscuits were so golden on top while being cooked on the stove. After about a month, I was sitting on the couch with Ebony and her mom, Linda. I asked, "Linda, how do you get those biscuits so golden on the stove?" I swear to you, Linda and Ebony nearly fell off of the couch laughing. When everyone finally calmed down, she explained to me that she just put them in the skillet and then baked them in the oven. Did I feel like a complete cracker or what??? *L* I went home and told my mom all about this, because I was truly fascinated. She looked at me like I had three heads, then began busting out laughing too. She had done that several times before, too. A lot of people from my mom and Linda's generation learned how to bake biscuits that way. I had no clue! *L*
-From Jen's blog, she was reminiscing of our "stalker days". When we were in high school, we were the #1 stalkers! If we liked or disliked somebody, they'd better watch out- because we were right up on them! We busted out Greenwood Drive in 34 different cars. We had our own "spy kit", complete with wigs, a change of clothes, glasses, and cameras. Oh the joys of being 16!
-When I was 18, and Ebony was 17, we were involved with these guys named Kenneth and Moe. They were both considerably older than we were, and even though I was 18, it's not like our parents would understand us seeing men THAT old at the time. They played ball on wednesday night in Bristol. Well, Ebony was still in school, so we had to make up places where we were going to tell her parents. We typically said we were going to the mall, movies, Fazoli's, you get the picture. Well, God knows what possessed us to actually tell her Daddy the truth. I'll NEVER forget what he told us. Instead of getting pissed off, and forbidding us to leave the house, he said, and I quote: "Ya'll need to get your stories straight before you come tellin' me where you're goin'." We just about fell over! Here we were telling Victor where we were going, for real, and he didn't believe us! We ended up telling him we were going to the mall and out to eat before he'd let us go. That was the ONLY time we were ever telling the truth, and totally weren't believed!
-In high school, Jen and I were WILD girls. If anyone crossed us, or did something we didn't like, we made sure they knew not to mess with us. Our first method of retaliation was "locker raids". This was back in the day before EHS had security cameras in the hall. We'd go through the lockers of people who didn't like, and trash any and everything in site. Talk about mean! We were vicious, although at the time, we thought it was more than justified. We were paid back, sorta. Our locker was locker #69, and one day, we came to school, and found a huge 69 spray painted on the inside of our locker *L*
-Christmas of 1994, my cousin Joey, aka: Gig (short for Gigalo), bought Jen a gift. Gig was maddly in love with Jen, and wanted her to go to the prom with him. He bought her this extremely trash black nightie, and a condom rose. He gave her this in the middle of hall during class changes. If you could've seen the lock on Jen's face when she opened it in front of everybody!
Those are just a few of my funny stories- you know me, I've got tons more, I'll share more soon! :0)
-In high school, as soon as I could drive, I went to my friend Ebony's house all the time. We always used the kitchen door to go in the house, and at least a couple of times a week, I'd see a cast iron skillet sitting on the stove with the prettiest, golden biscuits I've ever seen. Well, I was fascinated at how those biscuits were so golden on top while being cooked on the stove. After about a month, I was sitting on the couch with Ebony and her mom, Linda. I asked, "Linda, how do you get those biscuits so golden on the stove?" I swear to you, Linda and Ebony nearly fell off of the couch laughing. When everyone finally calmed down, she explained to me that she just put them in the skillet and then baked them in the oven. Did I feel like a complete cracker or what??? *L* I went home and told my mom all about this, because I was truly fascinated. She looked at me like I had three heads, then began busting out laughing too. She had done that several times before, too. A lot of people from my mom and Linda's generation learned how to bake biscuits that way. I had no clue! *L*
-From Jen's blog, she was reminiscing of our "stalker days". When we were in high school, we were the #1 stalkers! If we liked or disliked somebody, they'd better watch out- because we were right up on them! We busted out Greenwood Drive in 34 different cars. We had our own "spy kit", complete with wigs, a change of clothes, glasses, and cameras. Oh the joys of being 16!
-When I was 18, and Ebony was 17, we were involved with these guys named Kenneth and Moe. They were both considerably older than we were, and even though I was 18, it's not like our parents would understand us seeing men THAT old at the time. They played ball on wednesday night in Bristol. Well, Ebony was still in school, so we had to make up places where we were going to tell her parents. We typically said we were going to the mall, movies, Fazoli's, you get the picture. Well, God knows what possessed us to actually tell her Daddy the truth. I'll NEVER forget what he told us. Instead of getting pissed off, and forbidding us to leave the house, he said, and I quote: "Ya'll need to get your stories straight before you come tellin' me where you're goin'." We just about fell over! Here we were telling Victor where we were going, for real, and he didn't believe us! We ended up telling him we were going to the mall and out to eat before he'd let us go. That was the ONLY time we were ever telling the truth, and totally weren't believed!
-In high school, Jen and I were WILD girls. If anyone crossed us, or did something we didn't like, we made sure they knew not to mess with us. Our first method of retaliation was "locker raids". This was back in the day before EHS had security cameras in the hall. We'd go through the lockers of people who didn't like, and trash any and everything in site. Talk about mean! We were vicious, although at the time, we thought it was more than justified. We were paid back, sorta. Our locker was locker #69, and one day, we came to school, and found a huge 69 spray painted on the inside of our locker *L*
-Christmas of 1994, my cousin Joey, aka: Gig (short for Gigalo), bought Jen a gift. Gig was maddly in love with Jen, and wanted her to go to the prom with him. He bought her this extremely trash black nightie, and a condom rose. He gave her this in the middle of hall during class changes. If you could've seen the lock on Jen's face when she opened it in front of everybody!
Those are just a few of my funny stories- you know me, I've got tons more, I'll share more soon! :0)
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Where My Heart Is...
For those of you who haven't seen them, these are my Godsons, Luke (the infant) and Caleb. They are my heart. I love these children just like they were my own. I missed so much of Caleb's life while I was working myself to death, and worrying about things that weren't half as important as spending time with those you love. I'd promised myself, I'd make more time for them, to be there for them the way I should. You only get one chance at life, I don't want to miss any of theirs.
PS: You can check out My Best Friend, Jen (AKA: Monger), who is the mother of my Godsons, HERE. Stop by and say hi!
Also, Riccie- I'm so glad you're back! I've been trying to post on your blog, but blogger is being hateful to me, too :0(. Anyways, hang in there girl, I'm here for ya *Hugs*
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Music...
I've always been a person who loved music. I grew up listening to the hits from the 70's, 80's, and 90's. It seems like for every event, big or small, in my life, that music has played a big part of it. I can't turn on the radio without hearing something I've loved at some point in my life. Hearing certain songs takes me back to the moment I was in- I can remember EVERYTHING. I remember what I was doing, how I looked, how I felt, who was with me- it's like a movie playing back in my mind.
I've uploaded quite a few new songs, each one, holding a special memory for me. Strange Magic: By ELO, holds a special memory for me. It was the summer of 2004. I had dyed my hair brown, and HATED IT!! I decided I was going back blonde, and Susan and Eddie (AKA: Cracker) were going to help me. I went to their house with a bleaching kit. Susan put the bleach on my hair, and while I was processing under this dinosaur hair dryer that belonged to Cracker's Mamaw, we were flipping through the channels.
Susan stopped on Lifetime. Surprisingly, Eddie, Eddie (Cracker), nor Kevin objected. The movie (The Virgin Suicides), ended up scaring me for life. Where I'm going with this, during the movie, the song "Strange Magic" came on. Of course, I began singing along, and everyone ended up laughing and having a good time. It wasn't necessarily the most life changing moment, but I was with my friends, and doing something to improve myself, so it left an imprint in my memory, and my heart.
Jackie Blue. I'll keep it short- At Proffitts', we had a, well, I don't know exactly what it was, anyway- Our music pretty much would repeat itself every few days. As most of you know, I love 70's music, and every time Jackie Blue would come on, I'd go through the store, serenading anyone who I passed. Most of my co-workers thought I was nuts, but Kim, she would always sing along with me. Something I definitely miss.
Sister Christian. A song I grew up loving. A song that defines the 80's- and true story here- The song was originally titled "Sister Christy", but it didn't fit with the music, and was then changed to the song we all know and love, "Sister Christian". If you were growing up in the 80's you already know why I love this song, no explanation is necessary.
Time After Time (By Inoj). The remix. I still love the original, but the remix, I danced to with Bobbie at the club nearly 7 years ago. Bobbie and I were close, probably closer than we ever should've been. He was my best friend, and I hate things ended the way that they did- but I'll always have memories of that night.
Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves. A song of empowerment. I recently "broke out" this song after several years. After the strike, it became apparent, that if anything was going to be done, I had to do it for myself- and that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm doing it for myself.
The Space Between. The "Tim B." song. Nope, I've never told you about Tim. I will, I promise. He was my boss at a car dealership I once worked for. The job was absolutely fast paced. There was no time to breathe, no time to think- you just did your job. When there was a free moment, I felt like a goddess! I was one of 7 women, amongst 70 men! I was told, and I quote, "You look like you stepped right out of a magazine!" by one of the men. I was hit on daily, but the only one I wanted was Tim. This song would be playing on the radio nearly every day when I went to work. Tim would look at me and smile when it would play. I can't explain it, but there was a connection between us- unfortunately, there was a big space between us, that made it impossible for a relationship. Regardless, I treasure the memories.
I have a few other songs listed that hold special memories as well, but those were the biggies. Tell me, do you have songs that hold special memories for you?
I've uploaded quite a few new songs, each one, holding a special memory for me. Strange Magic: By ELO, holds a special memory for me. It was the summer of 2004. I had dyed my hair brown, and HATED IT!! I decided I was going back blonde, and Susan and Eddie (AKA: Cracker) were going to help me. I went to their house with a bleaching kit. Susan put the bleach on my hair, and while I was processing under this dinosaur hair dryer that belonged to Cracker's Mamaw, we were flipping through the channels.
Susan stopped on Lifetime. Surprisingly, Eddie, Eddie (Cracker), nor Kevin objected. The movie (The Virgin Suicides), ended up scaring me for life. Where I'm going with this, during the movie, the song "Strange Magic" came on. Of course, I began singing along, and everyone ended up laughing and having a good time. It wasn't necessarily the most life changing moment, but I was with my friends, and doing something to improve myself, so it left an imprint in my memory, and my heart.
Jackie Blue. I'll keep it short- At Proffitts', we had a, well, I don't know exactly what it was, anyway- Our music pretty much would repeat itself every few days. As most of you know, I love 70's music, and every time Jackie Blue would come on, I'd go through the store, serenading anyone who I passed. Most of my co-workers thought I was nuts, but Kim, she would always sing along with me. Something I definitely miss.
Sister Christian. A song I grew up loving. A song that defines the 80's- and true story here- The song was originally titled "Sister Christy", but it didn't fit with the music, and was then changed to the song we all know and love, "Sister Christian". If you were growing up in the 80's you already know why I love this song, no explanation is necessary.
Time After Time (By Inoj). The remix. I still love the original, but the remix, I danced to with Bobbie at the club nearly 7 years ago. Bobbie and I were close, probably closer than we ever should've been. He was my best friend, and I hate things ended the way that they did- but I'll always have memories of that night.
Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves. A song of empowerment. I recently "broke out" this song after several years. After the strike, it became apparent, that if anything was going to be done, I had to do it for myself- and that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm doing it for myself.
The Space Between. The "Tim B." song. Nope, I've never told you about Tim. I will, I promise. He was my boss at a car dealership I once worked for. The job was absolutely fast paced. There was no time to breathe, no time to think- you just did your job. When there was a free moment, I felt like a goddess! I was one of 7 women, amongst 70 men! I was told, and I quote, "You look like you stepped right out of a magazine!" by one of the men. I was hit on daily, but the only one I wanted was Tim. This song would be playing on the radio nearly every day when I went to work. Tim would look at me and smile when it would play. I can't explain it, but there was a connection between us- unfortunately, there was a big space between us, that made it impossible for a relationship. Regardless, I treasure the memories.
I have a few other songs listed that hold special memories as well, but those were the biggies. Tell me, do you have songs that hold special memories for you?
Friday, September 01, 2006
Let It Go...
There are people who can walk away from you.
Hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you-
Let them walk.
I don't want you to try to talk another person into
staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you,
coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.
When people can walk away from you let them walk.
Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.
The Bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]
People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay.
Let them go.
And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead.
You've got to know when it's dead.
You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me.
And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay.
Let them go!!
If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to past hurts and pains .....
LET IT GO!!!
If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth.....
LET IT GO!!!
If someone has angered you ........
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents .
LET IT GO!!!
If you have a bad attitude.......
LET IT GO!!!
If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better......
LET IT GO!!!
If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are struggling with the healing of a broken
relationship.......
LET IT GO!!!
If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves......
LET IT GO!!!
If you're feeling depressed and stressed .......
LET IT GO!!!
If there is a particular situation that you are so
used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it,"
then you need to......
LET IT GO!!!
Let the past be the past. Forget the former things.
GOD is doing a new thing for 2006!!!
LET IT GO!!!
"The Battle is the Lord's!"
I got this in my e-mail, and it hit home big time. I thought it was too good not to share...
Hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you-
Let them walk.
I don't want you to try to talk another person into
staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you,
coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.
When people can walk away from you let them walk.
Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.
The Bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]
People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay.
Let them go.
And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead.
You've got to know when it's dead.
You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me.
And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay.
Let them go!!
If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to past hurts and pains .....
LET IT GO!!!
If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth.....
LET IT GO!!!
If someone has angered you ........
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents .
LET IT GO!!!
If you have a bad attitude.......
LET IT GO!!!
If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better......
LET IT GO!!!
If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him......
LET IT GO!!!
If you are struggling with the healing of a broken
relationship.......
LET IT GO!!!
If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves......
LET IT GO!!!
If you're feeling depressed and stressed .......
LET IT GO!!!
If there is a particular situation that you are so
used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it,"
then you need to......
LET IT GO!!!
Let the past be the past. Forget the former things.
GOD is doing a new thing for 2006!!!
LET IT GO!!!
"The Battle is the Lord's!"
I got this in my e-mail, and it hit home big time. I thought it was too good not to share...
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