This Time Of Year...

Takes me back to a time, when I felt I held the world in the palm of my hand. The year, 1999. I was 20 years old, and thought I had ALL the answers. I was burned out from working at Merle Norman, and had my hours cut to part-time, so I could work full-time for Allstate Insurance. I absolutely loved working at Allstate. I was in the office by myself 99% of the time, so I could talk to my friends on the phone, have them in to visit- whatever I wanted. The office was next door to the DTO, which was where Eddie M, one of my best friends, was the manager. I spent a lot of time over there with him smoking and gossiping. When I was working at Allstate, I was the best friend you could ask for- I called ALL of my friends on a daily and/or weekly basis.

Danny, my boss, was awesome! He pretty much let me do whatever I wanted. How many of you can honestly say that your boss would let you go to the tanning bed and the bank, and the ONLY thing he asked in return was that you made him an appointment at the tanning bed? He was a great boss. I would be there today if the money had been right, but that's another story.

I worked two jobs, and LIVED on the internet. I loved chatting. Didn't matter who, I just loved meeting new people and making new friends. I had always wanted to have pen pals growing up, but my parents would never let me, so being able to meet people from all over the US and the world was a real treat for me. I would stay up until 3 and 4am in the morning talking to people.

Being the charming individual I am *L*, I managed to pick up many, MANY men. Most of which were NOT good for me. Let's take Mark for example. He was 42, I was 20. I was engaged to this man. Very bad. Not bright on my part. But I was young, wild, and free. I was burning the candle at both ends. When I met Mark I was in insurance school, which was nothing more than a 3 day course taught in a conference room at the Holiday Inn, in Johnson City. It was boring as hell, but for some reason, a very memorable experience.

After school, and every day for that matter, I had to go to the tanning bed. I was a complete tanning bed junkie. If I didn't tan, I thought I was going to die. In order to be "beautiful", I had to have bleached blonde hair, acrylic nails, and be VERY tanned. Because I'm naturally pale, I took my tanning bed playboy bunny sticker, and placed it on my left ankle. The pale flesh in the shape of a playboy bunny is still there. Perfume. I had to have it. Cool Water and Red 2 were essential. I didn't leave home without wearing one. My diamond heart necklace. I bought it for myself for Valentine's Day. I was alone, and was happy, so it was a symbol of my independence, I wore it every single day. The heart is now on my charm bracelet.

Back to men. I met Neil in March of 1999. I fell head over heels for this man. He was a high school football coach for a high school in Georgia. I absolutely loved this man. We talked EVERY single day and chatted every single night. Why didn't this work out, you ask? Well, my "Prince Charming", was married. Yep, bad move, Christy. I kept trying to justify what I was doing, saying, "He's, not happy", or, "He'll leave her". Oh. So. Wrong. You live and you learn. Ladies and Gentlemen, it is true- if they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you. Sure enough, he was cheating on me as well.

Then, there was Jeff. I met him before Neil, but he and I lost touch until late May, after Neil and I had broken up. Jeff was my dream come true. He was everything I wanted, and not a damn thing I needed. He was a professional football player, and played football all over Europe that summer. I waited patiently for him to return home in October, sending him cards and letters and calling on almost a daily basis. What did I receive in return? Heartbreak. Jeff wasn't the one, but had I been mature enough in the beginning I would've realized that I was trying so hard to make him into what I wanted him to be, not who he really was...

In August, I turned 21. I celebrated with my best friends. I had been through so much up until that point. I had to leave Allstate in July because I just wasn't making the money, I was back at Merle Norman, and depressed. I was smoking way too much, spending way too much online, and was far too concerned with my looks to focus on the things that really mattered.

By November, I was wondering what in the hell had happened to me. I started out the year with such high hopes and aspirations. I had everything I wanted, everything was going perfectly, doors were opening, that had never opened before, men were in abundance, youth, time and beauty were on my side. In 11 short months, my life had gone from absolutely fabulous to absolutely shitty.

I was depressed, I had run through men like they were running water, I had spent my money like it was growing on a tree, and had neglected everyone around me. The only reprieve I had was my "virtual life"- where I was still somebody. That's when I met my husband, Chris. He and I both were at an "All Time Low", in our lives. We didn't want a relationship, we didn't want sympathy, we just wanted someone who understood our pain, we finally found it, in each other.

I met Chris in November of 1999, and married him December of 2002. Now, I know you're wondering, what in the hell was this post all about? It was about what makes me feel better. Even though I did a lot of things that were stupid, a lot of things I regret, and a lot of things that I would never do again- it's a time in my life that brings a smile to my face when I think about it. I have more memories from the year 1999, than any other time in my life. I held the world in the palm of my hands, I had it all. If I had it all to do over again, I wouldn't change a thing. My life, in 1999, has greatly impacted who I am today.

When I have a hard day, or feel down, I look back at '99, and smile. There is so much more from that year that I didn't post- special times with friends, silly things we said and did, the laughter and tears we shared- we were close. I've not been that close with majority of those people since then. Maybe that's what I miss, the friendship- God knows I miss the beauty and youth, too.

I guess what I'm saying is, treasure every day, you never know when today, will be the day you look back upon fondly when life becomes too much to bear- you'll always have that memory, and that special day, will live in your heart- FOREVER...

All pictures, were taken in 1999- The Year Of My Life...

Have You Ever...

Just felt "blah". You know, you're not depressed or upset about anything, you just don't feel like writing, getting out, or whatever? I've been a little sick this weekend, and just haven't felt like really doing much- which would be the explanation for no posts this weekend. I had been a little down after hearing news about my job. Everyone remembers me telling them how excited I was to be able to go back to work at Merle Norman. Well, that's getting pushed back indefinitely.

Jim, the owners husband, has leukemia. They just found out, and it doesn't look good. They're not wanting to start something new right now with everything happening with him. I MORE than understand this- I mean, I can only imagine how upset I would be if I found out Chris had leukemia. Granted, Jim is in his late 70's and has lived a good life, you hate to hear news like this about anyone. So please, keep him and his family in your thoughts and prayers.

As for me, I'm still at the house, and bored. The weather has been pretty lousy the past couple of days, so I haven't really gotten out and accomplished much of anything- other than stripping and washing our bed *which takes 7 hours*- I'm not exaggerating here- to wash and dry everything on our bed. Well, at least it got taken care of!

Sorry I don't have any words of wisdom or anything to make you laugh today- although, hearing about my laundry might give some a good laugh! I'll be posting more during the week! BTW, that's just a random cow picture for your enjoyment...

Random Pics... Yet Again

I'll Do It Tomorrow...

How many times have we said that? "I'll do it tomorrow". Whatever it is, we think there's always tomorrow to do whatever it is that we need to do. For the past several months, I've found myself putting off more and more things until "tomorrow", only to never do them, or make an attempt to do them too late. You would think that since I'm a housewife, now I would be doing all of those things I kept saying, "I wish I had the time to do today, oh well, I guess I'll do them tomorrow". While I was working, there were so many things I wanted to do, and many times, I actually made time to do- like visiting my friends, making phone calls to those I haven't spoken to in awhile, sending much needed e-mails, cleaning the house- well, you get the point.

Granted, since August of last year, my health hasn't exactly been the best it could be, but that's no excuse. I could've picked up the phone to call someone. I could've gotten in my car and gone to visit my friends. I could've made the effort to send an e-mail, after all, I could spend hours writing blog entries, but I didn't. After losing my job, and my health giving me problems, I became depressed. All of the things I really wanted to do, I didn't really want to do. I was completely torn and conflicted.

I kept saying, "Well, I'll feel better tomorrow, I'll do (fill in the blank with whatever I needed to do) tomorrow". Tomorrow would come and go, and it wouldn't be done. The thing that finally hit home for me was when Verna died. I kept putting off going to see her. I had been so sick, but I knew Verna didn't have much time. I could've gotten in the car and made the drive to Bristol, but I didn't. The day I finally felt like a human, and really got my ass motivated to go see Verna, she had died- the day before. I got the call just as I was picking up the phone to call Geraldine. I was going to call her and tell her to let Verna know we were coming over tomorrow. There it is again- tomorrow. Well, this is one time, tomorrow was too late.

I know, there are times we can't help it. We can't do everything we want and/or need to do in a single day- after all, there are only 24 hours in a day, not everything in life can be done in those few hours. I guess what I'm saying is, do the things that are important to you. Spend time with those you love. Make the calls to those who are precious to you. Do the things you want AND need to do. So often we take for granted that we have tomorrow, when in reality, today is all we really have.

Kids Will Be Kids...

For the first time in nearly 15 years, we have children in our church. We've never had a really big program for youth, just simply because we've never really had more than one or two children at a time. We've been truly blessed in the past year! We now have 11 children in our youth program! My mother and I began teaching sunday school last year and though we were doing a fabulous job *yes, I was bragging on myself *LOL*. We had purchased all sorts of activity books and quarterlies with all sorts of Bible stories to help in our teaching.

In late November, we were beginning to prepare for the start of Advent. Our older children understand what Advent is, but our younger children, they don't- so we just simply focus on the meaning of Christmas with them. While the younger children were coloring in their activity book, my mother asked them "Do you know who's birthday it is on Christmas?", the children looked up at us puzzled. Ok, I knew right then, we were in trouble. So my mother told the children, "It's Jesus' birthday". The children looked up at us and said, "Who's Jesus?"

I nearly had a heartattack. In our eagerness to begin teaching and getting sunday school off the ground, we forgot completely to teach them who Jesus was! Honestly, I guess we just simply assumed that they would know, but when you're teaching young children, you can't assume anything. After explaining who Jesus was to the children, Wooz *Brandy is her name, that's another story in itself*, and Blaye looked up at us and said "We've been to Jesusland". *Ok, Jesusland is not a real place*. Well, I had to bite my tongue so that I didn't bust out laughing. As calmly as we could, my mother and I both asked, "Where is Jesusland". Without missing a beat, Blaye replied, "It's on Roan Street". Ok, Roan Street is in Johnson City, and the part he was referring to, was one of the roughest areas in Johnson City.

I nearly lost it. Those kids have the wildest imagination. We've come a long way since November. They now know who Jesus is, but we've gone all the way back. Today, we started with "The Creation". We figured it was best to start from the very beginning, so there was no confusion. Well, no more confusion anyway. It's it funny what kids can come up with?

Random Pictures... For Your Enjoyment

More... Quotes and Stories For Your Amusement...

As hard as it might be to believe, the stories listed below are ALL TRUE. The names have NOT been changed to protect the innocent/guilty/and/or just plain stupid. Enjoy.

1. Many of you probably know, but if you don't, Catherine Zeta-Jones is the official spokesmodel for Elizabeth Arden Cosmetics. Well, one of our AD's and displays had CZJ posing nude. Nothing was *visible* however, when Big Daddy came upstairs to my counter, he had a fit. I wasn't there when he saw this, but Geraldine was still laughing when when I came back from lunch. I noticed all of ad's were gone. Geraldine walked over to my counter and informed me that Big Daddy told her "Get this stuff down, we're in the Bible Belt- you can't be showing that in Bristol!", and he began jerking all of my ads down and took them to the dock.

2. I'm an avid "hermit crab" lover. I currently own three hermit crabs and have been known to brag about them. One day while working, someone said crabs. Well, I screamed out "I've got crabs!". Becky and Kim looked at me strange. I quickly clarified, "Of the hermit nature!"- I'm such a cracker!

3. Speaking of Cracker. One of my dear friends, Eddie H., his nickname is "Cracker". Cracker and the other Eddie were at Wal-Mart one night looking for a birthday gift for a friend's daughter. Cracker saw the "Wheelchair Barbie", and screamed out "Oh crip, it's a craple", instead of "Oh, crap, it's a criple". To make matters worse, there was a woman right behind him in a wheelchair. Cracker took off running.

4. Eddie, Cracker and I were discussing children's books one night. I was asking if anyone remembered a Dr. Seuss book about a "Sneech". Cracker looked at me and said, "It's a Greinch" *notice the spelling, not a Grinch*. So wrong, on SO many levels.

5. My cousin Holly and I were 15 in the summer of 1994. We played our cards right and conned our Aunt Judy into taking us to Myrtle Beach, letting us pick wherever we wanted to stay and do whatever we wanted to do- by pretending we didn't want to go back to the beach. To make a long story short, at night, Aunt Judy would sit outside in her bathing suit at night and read on the balcony. Well, about the same time, a younger "pool boy" would be down at the pool cleaning. Being typical teenagers, Holly opened the door, yelled down at the pool boy and then whistled, slamming the door quickly and locking Aunt Judy out. After we laughed hysterically for about a good 5 minutes, we finally unlocked the door, letting her in- She screamed out "Nice going, Holly", and Holly looked at her replying "Judy, I'm not that kind of girl". *That's kind of a, "You had to be there" kind of story, but I still laugh my ass off thinking about it!*

6. Just a random funny/mortifying story. In 7th grade, I was captain of the cheerleading team. At a home game, I wanted to impress Tate, *God only knows why*, a basketball player I was crazy about. When they ran to the other side of the court, I turned a cartwheel. As I flipped over, the ball came flying down the court, I kicked the ball- not only did I kick it, but I kicked it straight into the basket. I was mortified, although everyone was screaming. That's the first and last time I've EVER done that- and the ONLY time that was ever done in our school. Yep, I'm a legend *LOL*

8. While I was in beauty school, one of my friends, Preston, was working on the floor , and getting ready to go home. A woman walked in, with an appointment *once you've reached 150 hours, you can work on patrons as long as you're observed by an instructor*, so Preston asked her what her name was- the woman said, "I don't see why you need to know". Preston then explained to the woman that her appointment wasn't with him, but he'd be glad to pull her color card and prepare things for her stylist. The woman replied with "If you're not doing my hair, I don't see why you need my name". Again, Preston attempted to explain to the woman that he could get her color card and have everything ready so when Ashley was ready for her, she would be able to get started immediately. Again, the woman replied with, "I still don't see why you need to know my name. That was it. Preston was livid. He said, "Look lady, it matters not to me if you're here at 7:00pm tonight, I'm leaving at 2:00pm. I'm not tryin' to start a bank account, I'm just trying to get your color card", and walked away. He just left her standing there with her mouth wide open. When he came upstairs and told us the story, I LITERALLY laughed until I cried. I'm laughing my ass off right now trying to type! *LOL*

Moo! Save Molly The Cow!

SALMON, Idaho (Reuters) - A cow that escaped last week from a Montana slaughterhouse, leading workers and police on a six-hour chase, will be spared following a wave of popular support, officials said on Tuesday.

Del Morris, manager of Mickey's Packing Plant in Great Falls, said he decided to let the cow live the instant he saw it cross the Missouri River through Great Falls.

Town residents will now decide through a telephone poll whether the cow will remain a resident of Montana, where it will live out its life on pastureland surrounding the packing plant, or be shipped to an animal sanctuary in Seattle.

Morris said the heifer he calls Molly and her escape effort attained celebrity status with television and news organizations requesting interviews and calls pouring in from across the country and overseas.

"I've been around cattle all my life and it's just totally amazing," Morris said, adding that it is a rare cow that escapes slaughter. "I watched her do things that are just not possible for a cow."

What A Difference It Makes...

Well, I'm getting around to actually letting you know how things are going. Being the lazy individual I am, I just got my Christmas tree down last night. I spent hours sweeping and mopping, putting up decorations, and the work ended up flowing over into today. This evening, I was tired, and decided to do something for me. While the new clutch is being put in my Mustang, I'm having to rely on others for transportation. Is there anyone else out there who knows how BADLY that sucks? Well, it does. Anyway, my aunt took me to Johnson City to get my nails done.

Nancy and her husband, Timmy, opened a new nail salon in the Franklin Place Shopping Center. They have an absolutely beautiful salon, everything a nail tech dreams of having. Nancy and Timmy came to New York from Vietnam 13 years ago in search of a better life. I noticed how tired Nancy looked today. Bless her heart, she's so skinny. Timmy's not much bigger. I asked her how she'd been doing. She was worried. She's still trying to get everything moved from Bristol to Johnson City, and is absolutely worn out. She and Timmy own the salon in the Bristol Mall, and their new salon in Johnson City. They are the only two people working in Johnson City, so they only have one day a week off. It's not a wonder she's tired.

She's often told me about their lives in Vietnam. Her best day there, is far worse than our worst day here in the US could ever be. There is so much poverty. Most people have nothing. She told me she doesn't mind working hard. She appreciates everything she has, and the opportunities that she's been given. It made me really think. I've spent so many years bitching about my jobs, how we're treated unfairly *although sometimes were MORE than justified*, overall, as American's, we're spoiled. We have NO concept of what it's like to live in a country like Vietnam- having to leave everything you've ever known, just to be able to survive. Coming to a new country, means learning a new language, new customs, new laws- everything new and different from anything you've ever known.

Nancy and Timmy have worked so hard and complain so little. They don't rely on our government to support them, they don't rely on anyone but themselves. Even when they have customers who treat them horribly, and act as if they're stupid because they don't speak the best English, they keep on going. They don't quit. I admit. Years ago, it used to frustrate me to no end to go to the nail salons and hear all of the employees speaking a foreign language. Then one day it occurred to me, these people are having to learn the most difficult language in the world- English. They are speaking two languages, one of which they didn't come to until later in life. How remarkable is it, that they're making an effort? That they are learning a new language while holding onto their native tongue as well? It's amazing.

All in all, visiting the salon was so much more than getting a fill-in and a pedicure. I walked out realizing much more about how others live, and just how good I've had it. There is a lesson to be learned in everything. I'm glad my mind was open enough today to be able to see the one before me.

A Sweet Story...

As you well know, I love Panda Bears! This is a sweet story about "How Panda's Got Their Color". I thought I'd share it with my friends :0)

"Long long ago, the pandas lived in the high mountains of Tibet. Their fur was completely snow white. They were friends with young shepherdesses, who watched their flock in the mountains around their village.

One day a mother panda and her cub were playing with the shepherdesses and their flock, when a strong and hungry leopard attacked the panda cub. The shepherdesses try to save the cub, but the leopard kills the girls.

All the pandas in the area were very sad and hold a memorial service for the shepherdesses and to remember their sacrifice for the panda cub. The local custom in the mountains was to cover your arms with ashes to honor the deceased.

The pandas were very sad and they all wept. They wiped their eyes with their paws, and covered their ears to block the sound of the crying. They hugged each other to comfort those crying. As they did this, the ashes blacked their fur.

The pandas did not wash the black off their fur as a reminder of the girls."

Reflecting...

I've spent some time in the past few days reflecting on my life. I've been thinking about the way things are, and the way I want them to be. Since losing my job at Proffitts', I've slowly sunk down into a depression. You know, it's really funny, it seems like when you're in the deepest of depression, you have no clue you're depressed. My health was getting worse, and one by one, it seemed as if my friends were slipping away. I was alone. Sure, I had my husband, family, and church, but I began pushing them all away. I engulfed myself in my blog. Spending WAY too much time on line, causing me to slip deeper and deeper into depression.

I told no one of how I was truly feeling, not my husband, or closest of friends on the net or in real time. I didn't even know myself. How could I tell someone, if I didn't know myself? Like a light coming on, everything became so clear. Things really aren't as bad as I thought they were, and I was going to be ok. I have a very addictive personality. I jump from one addiction to another. When I say addiction, I can get addicted to damn near anything- Panda cam, soap operas, blogs, books, collecting dolls, shopping, well... You get the picture. I become addicted to things because I'm so bored.

I've often heard the term "ignorance is bliss". Damn straight. I wish I wasn't as smart as I am. I sometimes wish I didn't know half of the things I do, then I would be perfectly content to sit at home and be a housewife, instead of bored out of my mind and lonely. My mind is going 24/7, it never stops. If my mind isn't being stimulated, I'll sit and make up stories in my mind- which is how "Chloe' Gardner, and "The Breathless Fantasy", was born. There are tons. I've been relying on this for so many years that I consider it "normal". Although, I have no idea what normal actually means?

I didn't make any New Year's resolutions this year, because I never keep them. However, this is one thing I'd like to accomplish. I'd like to learn how to be happy just being me. Not relying on a job, or my friends, family and/or church, possessions or titles to make me happy. To just be happy being Christy. I've spent 27 years of my life relying on something more to make me happy, so this will be a big change. I'll let you know how it's going. It might not be pretty, but most things in life aren't.

In Memory...

ABINGDON – Frances Charlene Talbert Templeton, age 71, died Saturday, Dec. 31, 2005, in Wellmont Holston Valley Medical Center. She was born on Oct. 7, 1934, in Abingdon, the daughter of the late Charles Matthew Jr. and Frances Louise Showalter Talbert. She started working at the age of 14 with Parks Belk and later at the Peoples Drug Store. She was a 1957 graduate of Emory & Henry College, having earned her bachelor of science in nursing. While attending college, she worked at Johnston Memorial Hospital. She was a member of the Kappa Phi Alpha Sorority of Emory & Henry. She worked as an industrial nurse with Kingsport Press for seven years and was employed by Holston Valley Hospital and Medical Center as a registered nurse for 30 years, primarily as a nursing supervisor. She was listed in the Who's Who of American Nursing. She was a member of the Society of Nursing Professionals and was an American National Red Cross Nurse. She also served as an instructor of home health. She was an avid supporter of the Kingsport Fine Arts Center as well as the Kingsport Woman's Symphony. She served as a volunteer for Habitat for Humanity. She was a member of the Sinking Spring Presbyterian Church in Abingdon.Survivors include one son, Norman Glen Templeton and wife Wendy A. of Knoxville; one daughter, Lesley Ann Templeton Geldrich and fiancé Roderick A. Colter of Fishers, Ind.; one sister, Brenda Talbert Nottingham and husband John O. of Kingsport; six grandchildren, Ian E. Templeton, Sarah M. Templeton, William A. Templeton, Aaron A. Templeton, Nicholas A. Geldrich and Helen L. Geldrich.; three nieces; three nephews; and several cousins.Funeral services for Frances Charlene Talbert Templeton will be conducted at 1 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 4, 2006, in the Sinking Spring Presbyterian Church, with the Rev. Robert R. Tolar Jr. officiating. Burial will follow in the old Sinking Spring Cemetery.Active pallbearers will be John O. Nottingham, John B. Nottingham, Mark V. Snider, Miles R. Snider, James E. Choate III, Ian E. Templeton and Russell M. Moore.The family will receive friends in the parlor of the Sinking Spring Presbyterian Church from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., prior to the service. The family suggests that expressions of sympathy be in the form of memorial contributions to the Sinking Spring Presbyterian Church, Emory & Henry College or Habitat for Humanity. Those wishing to express sympathy online to the family of Mrs. Templeton may do so at www.frostfuneralhome.com.Frost Funeral Home 250 E. Main St., Abingdon, (276) 628-2131, is serving the family of Mrs. Frances Charlene Talbert Templeton.

*This is not the same Charlene I've mentioned in previous posts. Charlene was a former co-worker of mine from Proffitts'- a very sweet lady with a great heart. May she rest in peace- I'm only sorry I didn't know sooner*

Things Everyone Above The Mason Dixon Line Should Know...

Before heading South.

Learning Our Language:

1. "Borry"- Which means to Borrow something. IE: "Let me borry your lighter."

2. "Unthaw"- Which means to take something out of the freezer to thaw out. IE: "You'd better unthaw that chicken if you're gonna cook it tonight for dinner."

3. "Ace"(a-ce) - *How we pronounce "Ass" IE: "I'm gonna bust your ace".

4. "Pole Cat"- AKA: Skunk. IE: "Don't go out in the woods and get sprayed by that pole cat".

5. "Chitlin's"- A fried southern food, OR in reference to a child. IE: "Pass the chitlin's" or "Tell them chitlin's to get in the house for dinner."

6. "Baloney"- Bologna. IE: "I want a baloney sandwich for lunch".

7. Party Barn or Brew-Thru- A convience store where you can drive through and get your beer. IE: "Go to the party barn and get the beer before you come over to my house".

8. Coke- Any carbonated beverage. It doesn't matter what kind you have avalible, you always ask for a coke. IE: "Bring me a coke".

9. Manners. Everyone should have them. We expect "Yes, Ma'am, No, Ma'am, Please, and Thank You". If you don't use them, we'll kick your ass.

10. If you see a funeral procession on the road, you stop your car and pay respects along with everyone else. If you don't stop, we'll chase you down and kick your ass.

11. Respect our "Mamaw's and Papaw's"- if you don't, they'll knock some manners into your ass just like they did with us.

12. You can say anything you want about ANYONE as long as you say "God Love Them" or "Bless Their Heart". These are all purpose words that can be used from everything from sympathy or expression of affection to talking about someone you can't stand. IE : "Did you see Mrs. Jones' hair today? God love her, she thinks it looks good". OR "Bless your heart, I'm so sorry you've been so sick." A truly multi-functional phrase.

13. Not all people live in "Hollars" AKA: Hollow's, but we all know what they are, and if you're not from around there, don't be caught there after dark. It might not be pretty.

14. This is the "Bible Belt". You will see more Baptist Churches in one block than you'll see in the entire state of California.

15. Elvis. Need I say more?

16. Yes, we know it's humid.

17. "Lightning Bugs"- Known as "Fireflies" to some. We have tons of them, and catching them is a favorite summer past-time.

18. There is only one kind of tea- Iced Tea. It has sugar in it. Unless you are diabetic, we look at people funny who don't want sugar in their tea.

19. EVERYONE has a nickname.

20. There is no better time spent than "porch sittin'" with the family.


Those are just a few things you might want to know before you visit the South. Take these tips, use them wisely, and your trip South will be a pleasant one. Best of luck *LMAO*

Don't You Just Love...

How vain I am *LOL*- I'm not right, but yes, I do love pictures, and I do love having my picture made *that's a "Southern" saying ;0). I'm going to be doing a post on "Southern Sayings" soon, for all of my friends above and beyond the "Mason Dixon Line". Once again- Pictures, for your enjoyment...

Random Pictures For Your Enjoyment- Yet Again!

Moo!

Ok- that was just a random moo... I've been tagged!

These are the rules of the game: You must write a journal entry listing those weirdnesses you possess ~ as well as the rules of the game. Then, you select five people to tag and link their names/blogs in your entry. Go to their journals and leave a comment informing them they have been tagged by you and to read your journal to see in what way they have been nailed! Those five then MUST write an entry listing their weird habits and tag an additional five people.

1. I sleep with a "security cow"- yes, you've seen that one before- and a security cow is similar to a security blanket- it just happens to be a stuffed animal that's a cow.

2. I can't sleep ANYWHERE without my pillows and blanket from my bed

3. I won't wash my clothes in anything but Tide with Febreeze and "Purple" Snuggle or Downy. They just don't get clean or feel right if I don't.

4. I won't eat Reese's Cups if they aren't "fresh"- meaning, if they aren't creamy when I bite into them, I won't eat it.

5. I can't go to bed unless I've taken a shower (even for a nap)

Now, you all know I'm just as fruity as you thought I was! Maybe more so *LOL*

Now, for 5 people. Nearly everyone has been tagged, I'll see if I can't find 5 though ;0)

1. Deb
2. Jamie and Kismet
3. Awe
4. Lorrie
5. Suzanne

More... Random Pictures For Your Enjoyment

Just For Fun...

Some Quotes I'd Like To Share... Said By Random People In and Out Of My Life...

1. While listening to "My Sweet Lord", by George Harrison, I was singing along, and when it came to the line "Hare Krishna", I asked my mom, "Why is he singing about Hare Krishna?" she replied "I don't know, I guess he was at the airport". Don't ask me why, I laughed my ass off over this one.

2. A couple of weeks ago, I was having dinner with some of my former co-workers from Proffitts'. Charleen was telling us about how the man who did her tattoo had Tourette's Syndrome, only she had NO idea about this before hand. Lyndsey dropped her chip and looked up at us saying "Oh my God, that sounds dangerous! Is it contagious?"- I think that one speaks for itself.

3. About 12 years ago, my cousin Holly and I were eating at our local McDonald's, when a friend of mine, we'll call him LM, came to talk to me. LM, happens to be an African-American, and my cousin Holly, who is not as "worldly" as me *but by no means racist*, was talking to LM. He asked her out. Instead of saying "I have a boyfriend", or even "no thank you", my brilliant cousin says "I don't date shades". I was mortified. LM, fell in the floor laughing his ass off. He thought that was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. Holly had NO idea what she had said, and didn't mean it ugly at all. She just prefered to date caucasian men. The girl had no tact- come to think of it, still really doesn't.

4. Christmas 2004, Charleen and I were working at my Elizabeth Arden counter. I saw her smile at a man on the other side of my counter. She looked as if she knew him, so I didn't bother to ask the gentleman if he needed help. After standing there with Char for a good 5 minutes, she said "Christy, aren't you going to help that man?", I looked at her like she had three heads. I said "I thought you knew him". She replied, "Christy, I don't know every brother". Well, I lost it. I thought it was a friend of hers, because she acted like she knew him. I couldn't even ask the man if he needed help, I was doubled over my counter screaming and laughing. When Char finally composed herself, she asked him if he needed help, and explained that he looked like an ex of hers, and that's why I was laughing. He was a good sport, but bless his heart, he was looking for something we didn't have- and didn't even know what store he was in! *LOL*

5. My friend Jeremy's Theory on Sex- "Sex should be shared by two people who love and care about each other. If a third person is brought in, it should be three people who love and care about one another. Group Sex- I'm just not feeling the love". He said this to me in 1999 while I was sitting behind my desk at Allstate trying to type in payments. Just wrong *LOL*

6. October 2005- Geraldine is getting her ass chewed out by Big Daddy for having TWO days off during the first week of her gift *because her numbers were so bad*. She replies with "Don't talk to me about that, talk to that thing that makes our schedule"- I laughed my ass off, that's how our old manager Kim, became "That Thing That Made Our Schedule".

7. One night, my Aunt Judy and I were listening the radio, and an old song by John Mellencamp came on the radio. She looked at me and asked "Is that John Cougar MellenCOMP?" *Mellencomp- I laughed my ass off*- See, little things amuse me!

8. While working at Merle Norman Cosmetics a few years back, the owner hired a "VERY" outspoken religious woman. Don't get me wrong- I'm a Christian, but I don't preach hellfire and brimstone every time I turn around. With that being said, every word out of the woman's mouth ended with "Praise the Lord" or "Thank You, Jesus". Donna and I were about to die. The woman was driving us nuts. So we devised a little plan. Everytime the woman was getting on our nerves, we'd look at each other and say "PTL", and hold our hand up. The woman had no idea what we were doing, but Donna and I couldn't keep a straight face. Needless to say, she didn't last long.

9. One night while flipping through channels at Eddie, Eddie and Susan's house, I came across Benny Hinn. Now, if you've ever seen this man, you will KNOW what I'm talking about. As he was doing some of his "healing", I looked up at my friends and said "You know, he gives new meaning to "Knocking the hell" outta somebody".

10. A few months ago, my husband and I were watching Cops, on Court TV. He had gotten up to go get a drink, while he was gone, he asked me who they were arresting. Brilliantly, I replied, "That Mexiconaco". I was trying to say Mexican, and ended up crossing it with Mexcio, so it came out "Mexiconaco". That was so not right. Although my Mexican friends love it *LOL*

11. This isn't an actual quote, but one hell of a funny story. The cosmetic girls at Proffits' all knew how much I love Spongebob Squarepants, and constantly recite quotes from the show. One of my favorites is "When in Doubt, Pinky Out". So if we saw someone who thought they were God's gift, or we had a big sale, anything that required a "High Pinky", we'd all raise our pinkies in the air. One saturday, I went to bathroom, and as I came out, I noticed a woman walking out who had apparently had a stroke. *DISCLAIMER: I NEVER laugh at and/or make fun of someone over a disease, disorder, disability, ect* This is one time, I wasn't able to control it. The woman walked out, with her hand held up. Yes, you guessed it. The only finger she was holding up was her pinky. Immediately, I thought of "When in Doubt, Pinky Out". I had to act like I was coughing. I laughed all the way out of the bathroom and down to cosmetics where I proceded to tell the story to everyone else. They nearly died. *Once again, I stress, NO ONE was laughing over the woman's disability or anything like that, only that she was an honorary member of our "High Pinky Club".


The names have NOT been changed to protect the innocent, guilty, and/or just plain stupid. I hope you got a good laugh out of at least one of the above! :0)

My Interesting Anniversary...

As you well know, yesterday was my anniversary. My husband and I had no idea what we were going to do when we woke up. While I was putting on my makeup, I suggested we pack a bag and go to Gatlinburg for the night. We hadn't really done anything for ourselves in such a long time, and since it was our anniversary, we figured what the hell. So we packed a bag and off we went. Only, we got half to Johnson City, and had to turn around. I had forgotten my needles. I can't miss two injections, so I had to go back to the house to get my needles. Ok. We're finally off.

We arrived in Sevierville around 5:00pm. Now, this is New Year's Eve, and a saturday no less. You would've thought we would've been lined down off of the interstate waiting to get in- no. I was in shock. I was actually looking around to see if Jesus had come back, and I was left behind or something. This was totally NOT NORMAL. We pulled into what looked like a clean, decent motel- a Landmark Inn. There was vacancy! This is nuts! I wasn't complaining though. The room was clean and decent. The part I liked the best was when I opened the back door of our room, a ton of ducks came running towards me! Being the animal nut I am, I was so excited! I ended up making an ass of myself because I was out there quacking my heart out at these ducks, and there was someone outside of their room right next to us. Oh well, they just have to know me.

After getting settled into the hotel, we went to Chiang House, our favorite Japanese restaurant. Being on Byetta has been a blessing, but last night, I was rather sad. I wasn't able to enjoy all of my favorite foods because I couldn't eat them! By the time I had eaten a few bites of my salad, shrimp and rice, there was no room left for anything else! I managed to take a few bites of chicken, but that was about it. I was stuffed!!

After leaving Chiang House, we went to the new putt-putt course at Five Oaks. I was in heaven!!! I'm a cow freak. Yes, I admit it. I love cows. I love cows almost as much as Amey loves penguins. There were TONS of cows all over the course, I was "mooing" my heart out. See, I have this problem. I can't pass a cow without "mooing". I probably need to get some help for that. Anyway. That was the FIRST game of putt-putt I've EVER won against my husband!

After leaving the putt-putt course, we headed for downtown Gatlinburg. On the way, we were listening to 98.5 WTFM. They were having a New Year's Eve "Saturday Night Special". So I decided to call in and request "Like A Virgin"- just because that's what I sang at our reception. Gary Stevens got a kick out of that!

The traffic in Gatlinburg, yeah, that was normal. When we were finally able to make it our regular parking lot, we waited for literally 15 minutes for this dumbass to leave so that we could get his parking spot. When we were finally able to park, Chris was so pissed off that he locked the keys in the truck. I was ready to kill him!!! It was so cold, and Gatlinburg was so packed, I had no idea how we were going to get our keys out. We found a cop, and an hour later, he helped us get our keys out of the truck. I was absolutely FROZEN, and pissed off, so I wanted a drink.

We walked across the street to "Pucker's Bar". A $25.00 cover charge just to walk in the door!!! HELL NO!!! Christy was NOT paying $25.00 just to walk in somewhere to buy a beer- WRONG!!! Every bar had a huge cover charge, so we ended up just walking up and down the streets looking in different shops, waiting for midnight. Around 11:45pm, we walked back to the truck. It was almost time for the ball to drop from the space needle. We had our own "mini time square" in Gatlinburg! Yay!!! I was really excited. Being the simpleton I am, I couldn't wait for the ball to drop. After the ball dropped there were tons of fireworks. I sat on the tailgate of Chris' truck with him, freezing my ass off while we watched.

After the fireworks, we thought we'd hurry up and get in the truck, so we could be the first one's out. Ha! Little did we realize how many people were on the road one street up from us. People came herding down the road like a stampede of cattle! People were walking right down the middle of the street for nearly 45 minutes. We sat there thinking, damn, we've got to move in a minute. I'm actually glad we didn't, because a fight broke out in the bar across the street. I had to be a little redneck, I hung out the window of my husband's truck and took pictures of the fight and man getting arrested. That was so funny!!!

We made it back to the hotel somewhere around 2:00am. The night went downhill from there. I was so cold, and so sick on my stomach I thought I was going to die. I sat up until almost 6:00am sick. I have no idea what time I fell asleep. Chris woke me up around 10:00am, and we drove home. I can't complain too much though. Even though I'm feeling like shit now, I had a great time last night :0)